Updated Rules for People Who Forward Emails...

Without Thinking. I have many friends who still forward emails or repost Facebook posts without thinking. These rules are for them.

1.       I understand that not forwarding an email will not bring bad luck, cause me to lose friends, or erase my mailing lists.

2.       I acknowledge that forwarding an email will not make me hear music or see bizarre images of taco dogs.

3.       I recognize that Bill Gates is not sending me money, and Victoria's Secret is not aware of any gift certificates they're supposed to give me.

4.       I am aware that Ford will not offer me a 50% discount, no matter how many people I forward an email to.

5.       I will not expect to receive gift certificates, coupons, or freebies from any company for forwarding an email to a certain number of people.

6.       I am confident that I will not encounter pop-up windows or any other sudden surprises by forwarding emails.

7.       I understand that there is no email tracking program that rewards me with money for forwarding emails to a specific number of people.

8.       I recognize that the story of a child with cancer from Make-a-Wish collecting cards is outdated, and I will not perpetuate this misinformation.

9.       I am not gullible enough to believe that the government is planning to charge me for every email I send; there is no such bill in Congress.

10.    I will not expect any flashy animations, dancing characters or colourful flowers to appear on my screen after forwarding an email.

11.    I acknowledge that the American Red Cross does not donate money based on how many people I forward an email to; they rely on genuine donations.

12.    I will not allow anyone to guilt-trip me into forwarding emails by questioning my friendship or faith. If God has a message for me, I trust it won't come through an email chain.