Sunday, October 25, 2015

Acquired Brain Injury Day 2

After I was able to breath, my first thought and question was, "Did we cause more damage by not reacting when she complained of a headache?" His answer was "No, as soon as the bleed started the damage had been done and by having her seen within 24 hours although not ideal was ok".

After a bit more details about how serious the after affects of the bleed could be, the Dr left. I was alone, with my thoughts and was given about 10 minutes alone.  I was very upset and I started to cry, but I knew that falling apart at this point would not help anyone, so I gathered by thoughts and dried my eyes.  My main thought was how to break the news to my daughter, I was afraid for my wife but I felt that I needed to be strong for my daughter her partner and my grandson. In fact I felt helpless, a terrible feeling.

My daughter and her family arrived, those who know my daughter know that she wears were emotions on her sleeve. I knew that she had not handled the events to date well--and this was when we thought everything would be fine.

I was ready when my daughter came in to the room. I told her that they were currently operating and when she asked what the odds were, I said, " There is an 85% chance... "  and my daughter interrupted me and I did not finish the sentence.  At the time I was relieved that she did not question what I had said, and I made a decision to tell her the truth later that day. 

We then went to the main waiting room and as we waited, I marshaled my thoughts and made decisions about who I would phone in Canada and in what order, I would make the phone calls. Danielle and her partner Adam got in touch with his brother Dan to let him know what was going on and Dan offered the use of his house for us.

About four hours later, we were told my wife was in recovery and that we could see her. The Dr. told us that everything went well in the operation and the bleeding had stopped and was under control. I went down to see my wife and she was sleeping.  The nurse pulled me aside and said that the next few days would be critical to her recovery and she would have a nurse assigned to her one on one while she was in the critical care unit. 

I stayed for about half an hour and then went out to see my daughter and her family and inform them on how Colleen was doing. They were relieved that she appeared to be doing well. I cautioned them that the next week was critical to a full recovery. We left and I started to let people in Canada know the situation. The first call was to my son who was looking after our house. 

I told him the news and that his mom was in recovery and that the next few days would be critical and said that we would be in contact with him every day. I then phoned my wife's brother and talked to his wife after telling her the news, we talked about letting my wife's mother know and we agreed to not tell my wife's mother (who is in her late 80"s) until I knew more. 

I then phoned my brothers. All of the phone calls were hard, not only on me, but the people that I phoned. All the people I talked to were shocked by the news and but without exception they all offered moral and spiritual support. By the time I had finished I was an emotional wreck.  

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