The Caregiver’s Journey

I recently gave a workshop on Care for the caregiver and it reminded me of the wonderful and stressful job caregivers do for the people that are under their care. The demands of caregiving can be overwhelming.

Many people don’t view themselves as caregivers when in reality that is exactly what they are. Unfortunately, the number of male caregivers is increasing. One-third report extra expenses due to caregiving responsibilities. The economic value of this unpaid work is between 6 and 9 billion dollars.60% of caregivers assist a parent or in-law.

The roles of the caregiver are many and varied. A caregiver is someone who provides physical and/or emotional assistance to someone who is ill, frail or disabled. The role of a caregiver may include, household and financial management, coordinating communications, coordinating transportation and/or taking on the role of chauffeur. 

The caregiver may also be a chief cook and dish-washer, problem-solver, health aide, legal assistant, activist and advocate, and executive secretary.  Think of all the skills it takes to perform all these tasks. Many people family, friends and neighbours do not identify themselves as caregivers - they feel they are just ‘helping out’. 

No wonder caregiver’s burnout If the stress of care-giving progresses to burnout, it can damage both the caregiver’s physical and mental health. The caregiver has much less energy than before they started to give care. The caregiver is constantly exhausted, even after sleeping or taking a break and will often neglect personal needs. Caregivers also have trouble relaxing even when help is available.

When a caregiver is burned out, they will be increasingly impatient and irritable with the person being cared for. There is no shortage of recommendations for lowering stress, but we’ve zeroed in on five tips that are particularly pertinent for caregivers. Here are some of the ideas we recommend in our workshop

1.  Exercise.

Ø Find time to exercise even if it is only a short walk every day.

2.  Meditation.

3.  Prevention.

4.  Respite care.

5.  Seeking support.

6.  Take a break and pamper yourself:

Ø Have a massage or pedicure, go to a ball game, see a movie, or visit a friend.

Ø Watch a favourite TV show, take a walk or have a hot bath.

7.        Try to sleep at least 7.5 hours a night.

8.        Look for humour in everyday situations.

9.        Keep a journal and write down your thoughts and feelings.

10.    Watch for signs of depression and get help right away.

11.    When people offer to help, suggest specific things they can do, such as cooking or housework, or getting information (e.g. about support services).

There are many services may be offered in your community, to help caregivers reach out to such as:

1.              adult day care centres.

2.              home health aides.

3.              home-delivered meals.

4.              To find a community support group:

Ø   Ask the doctor or hospital for a referral.

Ø   Do a web search.

Ø Call your local health authority.

Many caregivers don’t know how to reach out for help nor do they understand the benefits of having a support group either in person or on the Internet. Here are some benefits of a support group:

1.  They may live near each other and meet regularly at a local site.

2.  It is a chance to develop communication skills.

3.  Contact is face-to-face and reduces feelings of isolation while providing a social outlet.

4.  If you join an Internet support group, people may be from all over the world share similar interests and problems.

5.  People from other areas might have new ideas.

The Caregiver’s Journey

There is no such thing as a perfect caregiver! When people offer to help, the answer should always be YES! Remember that you are responding to a disease, not to the person that once was. Ask for help if people don’t offer, they may think that you are doing well and don’t need help, there is nothing wrong in asking for help.