Second helpings

We love routine and stability; change scares us. I think that all of us at some point in our lives realized that the routine we strived for and had achieved was stifling. Indeed, I went through a period where I became so content with certain arrangements of life that I avoided variety. I was aware that I was in a rut of my own making I knew that I had parked my life in neutral. However, I was comfortable and was not willing to leave my comfort zone. In a battle, comfort tends to win over anxiety, uncertainty and not knowing.

When I think back to what could have been during those years, I almost wish for a magic wand that could give me a partial "do-over." A do-over would not have worked, of course, because I believe that you cannot wish yourself out of a comfortable zone. In most cases, we must have a crisis to help us rethink our position. Once the crisis is realized then we can snap into action and that action may force us out of our comfort zone. This will work for some but not all, many once the crisis is over will retreat to their comfort zone. As you think about retirement think of it as your opportunity to have a second helping of life not as a crisis.

As you face the prospect of getting your second helping at life in retirement, here are some ideas to consider as you move out of your comfort zone and hopefully do not retreat. What was it that kept you living a life that was far less than it could have been? Here are what some people will ask. Everyone’s answer will be different, which is great.

• Why am I afraid of change?

o What are the risks and rewards of making that change and are the risks worth the rewards?

• Why am I afraid of the unknown?

o I was doing OK with the known so what is it the reward of embracing the unknown?

• My family seemed to be prospering but should I start thinking of myself as I move forward? What is the worst thing that could happen if I shake them up? And could they live with it and embrace the change?

• I had to act age-appropriate, didn't I? I had responsibilities, but now I am retired I get to redefine age-appropriate and I have very few responsibilities.

• I have expenses, and my cash flow has to be maintained but if it is not what is the worst thing that could happen, and can I plan for that if it happens?

• Now that I am retired what else can I do?