Life Is an Adventure, If You Let It Be One

There is a phrase I have come to appreciate more as I get older:

You don't know what you don't know.

It sounds obvious, doesn't it?

But think about it for a moment.

We spend much of our lives collecting knowledge. We go to school. We learn a trade or profession. We raise families. We travel. We make mistakes. We fall in love. We lose people we love. We change jobs. We buy houses. We learn how to deal with disappointment, celebrate success and somehow get through all the things life throws at us.

After eight decades, I've learned a few things.

I've also learned that every time I think I finally understand how something works, someone, or something, comes along and proves me wrong.

And that's not necessarily a bad thing.

In fact, I think that's the point.

Life isn't about confirming everything we already believe.

It's about discovering what we don't know.

When we are young, we expect to learn.

When we get older, there can be a temptation to think we've already learned enough.

We've been there.

We've done that.

We've seen it before.

We know how this story ends.

But do we?

Probably not.

Every generation experiences things that previous generations never imagined. Technology changes. Medicine changes. The way we communicate changes. The way we work changes. The way we travel changes.

And we change, too.

That last part is easy to overlook.

The person I was at 30 isn't the person I am at 80.

I've accumulated experiences, friendships, disappointments, successes and failures that have changed the way I see the world. Some things I believed strongly when I was younger have changed. Other beliefs have become stronger.

That's what happens when we remain open to learning.

One of the things I enjoy about getting older is that I no longer feel I have to know the answer to every question.

I can simply ask.

“Why?”

“How does that work?”

“What do you think?”

“What am I missing?”

Those are powerful questions.

And they can take us places we never expected to go.

That's why I still ask questions.

It's why I still talk to strangers.

You never know what story the person sitting beside you has to tell.

You never know what you might learn from someone half your age, or twice your age.

It's why I still take the occasional wrong turn.

Sometimes intentionally.

There is something wonderful about not knowing exactly what is around the next corner.

We tend to think of a wrong turn as a mistake.

Sometimes it is.

But sometimes a wrong turn becomes an adventure.

You discover a little café.

You find a beautiful walking trail.

You meet somebody interesting.

You see something you would have missed if you had stayed on the planned route.

Some of the best parts of life aren't found on the itinerary.

They happen because something didn't go according to plan.

That is particularly important in retirement.

For decades, many of us lived by schedules.

School schedules.

Work schedules.

Family schedules.

Appointments.

Deadlines.

Meetings.

Then suddenly we retire and discover that nobody is telling us where we need to be tomorrow morning.

At first, that can be unsettling.

But it can also be an invitation.

An invitation to explore.

Try something you've never tried.

Take a class.

Learn how to use technology instead of complaining that technology has ruined everything.

Go somewhere you've never been.

Talk to someone you don't know.

Read something outside your usual interests.

Volunteer somewhere different.

Try a new food.

Take a different route home.

Say yes occasionally when your first instinct is to say, “That's not really my thing.”

You might discover that it is.

And if you don't like it?

You've learned something, too.

That's the beauty of curiosity.

There is no failure in discovering that something isn't for you.

You simply know more than you did before.

The danger isn't getting older.

The danger is deciding that because we are older, there is nothing left to discover.

I don't want to live that way.

I don't want to spend my remaining years simply repeating what I already know.

I want to be surprised.

I want to learn something that makes me say, “I didn't know that.”

I want to meet people who challenge the way I think.

I want to hear stories I haven't heard before.

I want to take a few more wrong turns.

I want to leave some room in my life for the unexpected.

Because perhaps that's what an adventure really is.

It isn't necessarily climbing a mountain, travelling around the world or doing something dangerous.

An adventure can be as simple as walking through a door you've never opened before.

At our age, we have something young people don't yet have yet, decades of experience.

But young people have something we should never lose, the willingness to discover.

We need both.

Experience gives us confidence.

Curiosity keeps us growing.

So don't be afraid to say, “I don't know.”

Those three words aren't a sign of weakness.

They are an invitation.

“I don't know.”

“Tell me.”

“Show me.”

“Let's find out.”

After eight decades, I keep coming back to the same lesson:

You don't know what you don't know.

And that's not something to fear.

It's something to celebrate.

Because somewhere out there, perhaps around the next corner, in the next conversation, on the next unexpected journey, is something you haven't experienced yet.

So, keep asking.

Keep looking.

Keep exploring.

Keep going.

And continue the conversation

Take the occasional wrong turn.

Whatever you do, don't close the door on an adventure simply because you think you've already seen everything.

You haven't.

Neither have I.

And that's what makes tomorrow interesting and what makes it more interesting is all the ghosts, goblins, superheros and witches who will vist us tomorrow on Halloween.