Thursday, August 26, 2010


One of the most debated subjects around the world is forgiveness. Somebody does something wrong, either against an individual, or against the society. To forgive means to pardon the accused with no resentment left. If forgiveness is complete, the act or offense is not totally forgotten, the memories will remain, but the act of forgiveness allows us to move on with our lives in a meaningful way, not to stay stuck in the past with horrific memories of wrong done to us.

To talk about forgiveness is easy, but to forgive is difficult. Many a times it becomes impossible for some of us. For example what about a father who has a criminal kidnap his child and then slowly kills the child in his presence to derive sadistic pleasure, how will he feel? What about the cries of pain of his dying child? Will his mind forget them? What of the helplessness that he would feel? What about the expectation with which his child looked at himand felt sure that his father would do something to save him/her? What of the helplessness he  felt? What about the memories of bringing up his child? What about the dreams that he had for the child? What about the pain and torture his child underwent while dying?

His nightmares may haunt him forever. Anything that belonged to his child will bring the memories of death back like a wave. His sadness will overwhelm himforever and his silent fury against his own weakness will kill me. Can he ever forgive that man?

This is the most difficult part of forgiveness. It may feel impossible to forgive. The scars go so deep that even after the man is sentenced for the crime, the father will never feel complete. No amount of punishment given to that man will ever bring the child back. No clock will ever turn back. The pain that the child underwent cannot be taken away at all.

He is doomed to live in misery forever unless he can forgive and I know that if it was my child; the child  would not want me to live that life, so I would forgive but not forget. Would you?

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