Funny Retirement Quotes

The following quotes are from The Joy of being Retired Webpage, which is part of a wonderful and funny look at retirement by Ernie Zelinski. I  recommend his books to you. Here are some links to follow-up if you like the humour in the quotes below

The subtitle, " Retirement wisdom that you won't get from your financial advisor," hits the nail on the head. This book takes a free-spirited view of retirement, and it can be infectious.  Zelinski not only encourages you to adopt a fresh outlook, but helps you do so in specific,  concrete ways. His apporach is informative, fun, and sometimes astonishing. - from Retirement Works Book Reviews writing about Ernie Zelinski’s How to Retire Happy, Wild, and Free

Gainfully unemployed, very proud of it, too.— Charles Baxter in the The Feast of Love

Viva la retirement, grab it by the horns and go for it.
— Cheryl Marland at the Retirement Blog But What Now

Retirement life begins when the kids move out and the cat gets run over.— Author Unknown

The money is no better in retirement but the hours are!
— Author Unknown

Happiness is being retired and spending all of my kids' inheritance before I die!
— Anon

Retirement: When you quit working just before your heart does.
— Author Unknown 

My retirement plan is to find a shopping cart with good snow tires.
— Patty Doyle

He or she who laughs last at the boss's jokes probably isn't far from retirement.
— Unknown wise person

Retirement is wonderful. It's doing nothing without worrying about getting caught at it.
— Gene Perret

My only [retirement] advice is to lay off alcohol, tobacco, and wild women. Any can kill you.
— James Biggs (104-year-old resident in a Dallas retirement-community)