A woman brought a very limp duck into a
veterinary surgery As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his
stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook
his head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, Cuddles has passed away."
The distressed owner wailed, "Are
you sure?"
"Yes, I am sure. The duck is
dead," he replied.
"How can you be so sure," she
protested. "I mean; you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He
might just be in a coma or something."
The vet rolled his eyes, turned around
and left the room, and returned a few moments later with a black Labrador
Retriever. As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his
hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck
from top to bottom.
He then looked at the vet with sad eyes
and shook his head. The vet patted the dog and took it out, and returned a few
moments later with a beautiful cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also
sniffed delicately at the bird. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its
head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. The vet looked at the woman
and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100%
certifiably, a dead duck."
Then the vet turned to his computer
terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill which he handed to the woman.
The duck's owner, still in shock, took
the bill. "$150!", she cried, "$150 just to tell me my duck is
dead?!!"
The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If
you'd taken my word for it, the bill would have been $20, but what with the Lab
Report and the Cat Scan
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