Speak with confidence

 Speak confidently as if you are right, but listen carefully as if you are wrong. Early on in life, I realized that if you listen carefully to people you could learn from them. Over my career I have found success by surrounding and supporting those who are smarter than me or who have better skill sets then I do.

One thing that my father taught me when I was about 15 years old was that there would be people who take advantage of their position. These people would bully, cajole, or demean those who they had power over because they could. My dad said, if you are in that situation as a worker, you have a choice, be bullied, stand up for yourself, or quit. He also said that if you are on equal standing as a supervisor with the bully, it is your responsibility to tell them to stop, and if they don’t then you need to report them and if that does not work, then you need to leave. Management which allows this type of behavior is not worth working with and you will regret your decision to stay.

Over my working life, I was fortunate to work with only one boss that was a bully. I stood up for myself and for my pains I was fired. At the time, it was devastating, but eventually it was a blessing. As a result of being fired, I took some time to revaluate my priorities and changed my career path. When I went into education, I remembered what my dad said, and never tried to force my students or bully them. I also, because of my mom and my dad, grew up with a sense of confidence that I could do whatever I wanted to do.

As I moved into new areas that others were not sure of, I listened to what people said and I learned from them, and I also learned how to speak with confidence. Speak with confidence and it has a strange effect on people, they want to believe you and that creates a sense of responsibility for them. I have found that whatever I went into, over time I have moved into leadership positions and in those positions I always speak with confidence but listen as if I am wrong.