Ah, the dreaded Christmas decorating competition! Back in the good ol' '70s, it was all about simplicity and elegance. But then the '80s hit like a storm of glitter and inflatable snowmen, and suddenly everyone lost their marbles! It was like a holiday version of the Hunger Games - may the best-decorated house survive!
Driving through those neighbourhoods during the festive season was like entering a psychedelic wonderland. Twinkling lights blinded you, inflatable snowmen threatened to take over the world, and houses looked like they were auditioning for a role in a Christmas movie. It was pure madness, and I couldn't help but feel like I was in a cheesy holiday version of a Fast and Furious movie, with neighbours racing to outshine each other.
When we moved to our new house in the '90s, I thought I could resist the temptation to go overboard with decorations. I pledged to stay classy, like a Christmas version of James Bond - simple, yet elegant. But, alas, my willpower lasted about as long as a snowflake in a microwave. The neighbours' competition got to me, and I found myself smack dab in the middle of the tinsel tornado.
One year, I bought a massive, dancing reindeer for my lawn, thinking I'd claim the title of the "Christmas Decor King." But instead, I just felt like the reindeer had taken over my life, like some festive version of the Terminator.
It didn't help that our street ended up on the infamous "lights to see" tours that the local newspapers loved to hype up. It was like we became the Las Vegas strip of Christmas lights, attracting tour buses full of gawking spectators. I half-expected Elvis in a Santa suit to appear.
Finally, I saw the light (pun intended). I realized that the race for the gaudiest decorations wasn't worth it. I waved the white flag of surrender and returned to my simple but elegant ways. Just some lights around the windows and eaves were enough to spread the holiday cheer without becoming the neighbourhood's unofficial Christmas theme park.
Thankfully, my neighbours eventually came to their senses too. It took them a couple of years to snap out of their decorating frenzy, but sanity prevailed. No more tour buses, no more Christmas light paparazzi - just a bunch of folks enjoying the holiday season without competing in the Christmas Decoration Olympics.
So, let this be a lesson to all holiday decorators out there: Less is more, and you don't need a battalion of inflatable snowmen to spread the joy. Keep it simple, keep it classy, and let's bring back the good ol' days of tasteful Christmas cheer! Tomorrow I am going to talk about Christmas music.
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