More thoughts on Transitions

 As I write this I am in great pain, I injured my shoulder and my hip is acting up and so I am feeling a bit sorry for myself.  So, in the spirit of adventure, to stop feeling sorry for myself, and to keep on a theme  here are some quotes about ageing and the transition to retirement

“Retirement is wonderful. ...

“I guess it comes down to a simple choice, really. ...

“Stay young at heart, kind in spirit, and enjoy retirement living.”

“The key to retirement is to find joy in the little things.” – Susan Miller.

“There's never enough time to do all the nothing you want.”

“You are not too old, and it is not too late to dive into your increasing depths where life calmly gives out its own secret.” — Rainer Maria Rilke

“Transitions are almost always signs of growth, but they can bring feelings of loss.

To get somewhere new, we may have to leave somewhere else behind.” — Fred Rogers

“Just when the caterpillar thought her life was over, she began to fly.” — A modern twist on an old proverb

“Often when you think you’re at the end of something, you’re at the beginning of something else.” ― Fred Rogers (yes, again)

“My Mission: I’ll stop stressing about the future. Instead, I’ll take that wasted energy and put it into enjoying the present — each day — just a little bit more.”  —Karen Salmansohn

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.”  — Wayne Dyer

Once you retire, you gain complete control over your time, experience more freedom to travel, can pursue new hobbies, and get the chance to experience a vibrant social life.

This time of transition can be made meaningful and useful. It could become the launching pad for the rest of your life. 

The longer I live the more beautiful life becomes.”  ~ Frank Lloyd Wright

“There is a fountain of youth: it is your mind, your talents, the creativity you bring to your life and the lives of people you love. When you learn to tap this source, you will truly have defeated age.” ~Sophia Loren

“In the central place of every heart, there is a recording chamber.  So long as it receives a message of beauty, hope, cheer, and courage – so long are you young.  When the wires are all down and our heart is covered with the snow of pessimism and the ice of cynicism, then, and only then, are you grown old.”  ~Douglas MacArthur

“For the unlearned, old age is winter; for the learned, it is the season of the harvest.”   ~Hasidic saying

“Every year should teach you something valuable; whether you get the lesson is up to you. Every year brings you closer to expressing your whole and healed self.”   ~Oprah Winfrey

“One of the reasons people get old—lose their aliveness—is that they get weighed down by all of their stuff.” ~Richard Leider 

and my favourite:

“Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don’t mind, it doesn’t matter.” ~Mark Twain

Questions to think about

Here are four questions that hopefully will stimulate your thinking about your retirement planning. They are easy questions that are very hard to answer. In your answers think about the pictures and images they call to your mind. There is no correct or wrong answer. You will, however, notice a theme and a progression which hopefully will focus your thoughts. 

I want you to assume that you are financially secure. This means you have enough money to take care of your basic needs and wants now and in the future.
  
The first question is…how would you live your life?  
In answering this question, consider if you would you change anything? Use your imagination and do not hold back on your dreams.  Take some time and write down a description of your complete life with as much detail as you can think about. 

In the next question, you have gone to visit your doctor who tells you that you have only 5 years to live. 

The second question is What will you do in the time you have remaining to live?  What will you change in your life and how will you do it? Will you move, will you change relationships, will you travel, will you create and finish a bucket list?

We move along and you visit your doctor and you are told that you only have one day left to live. This is a shock, but take the time to notice what feelings arise as you confront your very real mortality. 

The third question is in three parts. What will I miss?,  Who did I not get to be?  What did I not get to do? As we are confronted by our own mortality or when we go to the next Celebration of Life, we should think about these questions and if we can we should take steps to be the person I am not yet, and do the things that I have not yet done and spend more time with the people I will miss.

Imagine you are the wise elder of your family and community. The last question goes beyond your life and asks you to contemplate your vision for a better world future and what you can do to create the world you would wish to live in.

The fourth question is What world you would like your grandchildren, great-grandchildren, great, great-grandchildren to live in?  When thinking about your answer, consider what lifestyle changes/actions (large or small) can you take today to ensure the sustainability of the human family and natural world around you for generations to come? What is it that you have done, or will do to make the world closer to the world you imagine for your family?

Transitions

Let’s confront it head-on; retirement is a major life transformation, like going off to university, getting a partner for the first time, or going back to living without children in your home. Retirement may take a little time to get used to; it took me eight years. Create a plan, but don't worry if the plan will not be as you imagined. Based on my life experience and my experience in talking to others here are some suggestions for a steady transformation and a glorious retirement:

·   Required duties kill the spirit notwithstanding age. Don’t agonize about what you believe you should be doing or what others think you should be doing when you retire.  This is about you. It’s your time to do what you want.

·  Generate a daily plan. It may sound like a fabulous scheme to throw away your alarm clock and avoid any new responsibilities. A sudden lack of structure is and can be unsettling for many of us.  I stopped getting up at 6:30 over the first year of my retirement and now I get up closer to 8:30 but that was after 13 years of retirement.  We all need a reason to get up in the morning, so I recommend that you plan to be up by a certain time and have some activities scheduled for specific days each week.

·  Rekindle old friendships. If you can try and develop new friends hopefully in different age groups. I love to read and since I retired I have read hundreds of new books, and I love to putter around my house, I find it comfortable. At the same time, I volunteer, go out with my friends on a weekly basis because I know these activities dare more beneficial to my mental health. It is not easy making new friends when you retire, but one of the easiest ways to make new friends is through new activities such as sports, seminars, cooking classes, travel, hiking clubs, poker night, book clubs, yoga, wine tasting, etc.

·  Get professional help. It took me eight or so years to get used to retirement because I retired without a plan. I was, however, very lucky because I had friends I could talk to about goals and what to do with retirement. Some people may need professional help with this if so, I recommend that you get the help before retirement not after.  The folks who sit down and discuss/plan their post-retirement goals are the ones who typically have a more satisfied, fulfilling retirement.  This can especially be beneficial for married couples and can/should be done before you retire to get on the same page about expectations and concerns. Sometimes people who have retired without a plan may experience some of the following signs and symptoms, If you do experience some of these on a daily basis or for more than two weeks, you may be suffering from depression:

·         Persistent sad, anxious, or “empty” mood

·         Feelings of hopelessness, or pessimism

·         Irritability

·         Feelings of guilt, worthlessness, or helplessness

·         Loss of interest or pleasure in hobbies and           
           activities

·         Decreased energy or fatigue

·         Moving or talking more slowly

·         Feeling restless or having trouble sitting still

·         Difficulty concentrating, remembering, or making         decisions

·         Difficulty sleeping, early-morning awakening, or 
           oversleeping

·         Appetite and/or weight changes

·         Thoughts of death or suicide, or suicide attempts

·         Aches or pains, headaches, cramps, or digestive 
           problems without a clear physical cause and/or 
           that do not ease even with treatment.

Not everyone who is depressed experiences every symptom. Some people experience only a few symptoms while others may experience many. That is why it is important to not self diagnose and talk to your doctor.

Transitions to retirement or anything new 2

William Bridges wrote a very personal account of his own transition during and after his wife’s battle with, and eventual death from, breast cancer. The Way of Transition is the book. In the book, Bridges helps us to understand transition as so much more than simply a change from one state to another. He explains that transition has three parts, only one of which is the liminal space. The three parts, which Bridges says overlap rather than occur sequentially, are:

1.   Making an Ending

This involves more than just leaving your job, or waving bye to the kids as they move out of your house. A good ending requires that you let go not only of what you used to do but of who you used to be. For example, I retired and then immediately start working as a substitute teacher, my rationale was that I still wanted to teach and I thought a bit of extra money and an opportunity to continue to work with colleagues and students, would be helpful. But the real reason was that I still identified myself as a teacher. It took me another 8 years before I realized that I needed to end my role as a teacher and find a new role. Without an ending, there is no new beginning and no possibility of transition.

2.               Inhabiting the Neutral Zone

Danaan Pary describes it as letting go of one trapeze bar and grabbing the next one. “But every once in a while, as I'm merrily (or even not-so-merrily) swinging along, I look out ahead of me into the distance and what do I see? I see another trapeze bar swinging toward me. It's empty and I know, in that place in me that knows, that this new trapeze bar has my name on it. It is my next step, my growth, my aliveness coming to get me. In my heart of hearts, I know that, for me to grow, I must release my grip on this present, well-known bar and move to the new one.

Each time it happens to me I hope (no, I pray) that I won't have to let go of my old bar completely before I grab the new one. But in my knowing place, I know that I must totally release my grasp on my old bar and, for some moment in time, I must hurtle across space before I can grab onto the new bar.”

William Bridges speaks of this time, as a time of chaos, as “that state of pure energy that is experienced either as a jumble or a time of empty nothingness [that] makes us feel out of control and a little crazy.”

3.               Making a New Beginning

When beginnings come after a definite ending, and time hanging out in the liminal space, those beginnings have great power. Bridges assure us that they are “marked by a release of new energy in a new direction–they are the expression of a new identity.”

Every new beginning confirms that the ending we experienced was real. We will feel a sense of the original loss. And we may worry that this won’t be the right new beginning for us, or that we might fail.

How to Survive and Thrive in a Liminal Space

Liminal Spaces require that we be willing to live with the ambiguity of not knowing what’s next. That’s an incredibly uncomfortable, anxiety-provoking place for many of us.

While waiting is the primary task of the neutral zone, there are a few things you can do while you wait.

·       Schedule a new experience at least once a week. Ideas could be everything from wandering through a toy store to taking a guided walking tour of your own town.

·       Pay attention to meaningful coincidences, or what Carl Jung referred to as synchronicity. They often serve as arrows pointing the way to your next step.

·       Access your creativity in whatever form works for you. You might plant a garden, paint a picture, or write a poem. Creative acts are both soothing and supportive of self-understanding.

·       Meditate.  Meditation is enormously helpful in managing anxiety and getting us used to wait peacefully.

 “We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.” Joseph Campbell

Transitions to retirement or anything new 1

We cannot discover new oceans unless we have the courage to lose sight of the shore. Anonymous     

I had not heard the term liminal space until a few days ago and I was enchanted by the concept. The word liminal comes from the Latin word limen, meaning threshold, any point or place of entering or beginning. A liminal space is not just the physical space between one place and the next it is also the time between the ‘what was’ and the ‘what will be our next.’ Liminal space for some is a place of transition, waiting, and most importantly, in my mind, not knowing.

Author and theologian Richard Rohr described this space as:

“where we are betwixt and between the familiar and the completely unknown. There alone is our old world left behind, while we are not yet sure of the new existence. That’s a good space where genuine newness can begin. Get there often and stay as long as you can by whatever means possible…This is the sacred space where the old world is able to fall apart, and a bigger world is revealed. If we don’t encounter liminal space in our lives, we start idealizing normalcy”.

Have you ever been in a physical liminal space? I have, and so have you I suspect. Every time I go to present a workshop to a new group, I stand at the door, just before crossing that threshold not knowing what to expect. The scariest physical liminal space I remember standing in was the room my wife had just entered to give birth to my daughter. I stood on the threshold and was afraid of going in, but I knew I had to enter to start our new adventure. Maybe you are more familiar with the emotional liminal space that you have encountered? Some of these could have been at the moment of transition from:

·       one home to another

·       married to divorced

·       employed to fired or retired

·       with children coming home to an empty-nester

·       the end of one decade to the start of another (i.e., age 59 to 60)

·       a loved one in your life is gone from your life through death

Each of these finds us where Rohr said, “where we are betwixt and between the familiar and the completely unknown”. It is a scary and lonely place to be. As a result, most of us will avoid making a transition if we don’t know what is coming next. We stay in a lousy marriage, we wait a few more years before moving, or we postpone our retirement date until we have amassed more money, sense or our health forces us to retire. Many of us will try to get through this time as quickly as possible. We will land on what next so we can feel comfortable.

Retirement Confidence Survey

 We are getting more confident about retirement or my friends in the USA are getting more confident. Hopefully this confidence shifts to us here in Canada.  The 2015 annual Retirement Confidence Survey (RCS) marks the 25th year of the RCS, making it the longest-running survey of its kind in the nation. Among this year’s highlights:

• Whether or not Americans have a retirement savings plan is a key factor in their outlook about having an affordable retirement. The 2015 RCS by EBRI/Greenwald & Associates finds that the nation’s retirement confidence continues to rebound from the record lows experienced between 2009 and 2013—but this is based on the increasing optimism of those who indicate they and/or their spouse have a retirement plan.
• The percentage of workers confident about having enough money for a comfortable retirement, at record lows between 2009 and 2013, increased in 2014 and again in 2015. Twenty-two percent are now very confident (up from 13 percent in 2013 and 18 percent in 2014), while 36 percent are somewhat confident. Twenty-four percent are not at all confident (statistically unchanged from 28 percent in 2013 and 24 percent in 2014).
• The increased confidence since 2013 is strongly related to retirement plan participation. Among those with a  plan, the percentage very confident increased from 14 percent in 2013 to 28 percent in 2015. In contrast, the percentage very confident remained statistically unchanged among those without a plan (10 percent in 2013, 9 percent in 2014, and 12 percent in 2015).
• Retiree confidence in having a financially secure retirement, which historically tends to exceed worker confidence levels, also increased, with 37 percent very confident (up from 18 percent in 2013 and 27 percent in 2014). The percentage not at all confident was 14 percent (statistically unchanged from 14 percent in 2013 and 17 percent in 2014).
• Worker confidence in the affordability of various aspects of retirement has also rebounded. In particular, the percentage of workers who are very confident in their ability to pay for basic expenses has increased (37 percent, up from 25 percent in 2013 and 29 percent in 2014). The percentages of workers who are very confident in their ability to pay for medical expenses (18 percent, up from 12 percent in 2011) and long-term care expenses (14 percent, up from 9 percent in 2011) are slowly inching upward.
• Cost of living and day-to-day expenses head the list of reasons why workers do not save (or save more) for retirement, with 50 percent of workers citing these factors. Nevertheless, many workers say they could save a small amount more. Seven in 10 (69 percent) state they could save $25 a week more than they are currently saving for retirement.

Canada pension plan

The pressure is on and the attacks continue on the Canada Pension Plan (CPP).  A report says administrators are hiding the fact that the cost of running the Canada Pension Plan has more than tripled since 2006 because of transaction and external management fees.

The Fraser Institute report says proponents of an expanded CPP or a provincial pension plan in Ontario don't talk about the hidden costs of large, government-managed plans.

Philip Cross, co-author of the study and a former chief economic analyst for Statistics Canada, says the total cost of running the CPP jumped to $2 billion in 2012-13, from $600 million in 2006-07.

Canadians should be informed of the total costs of the CPP’s operations and the total costs involved in its increasingly complex investment strategy,” Cross and Emes wrote in their report.

The report failed to mention that both of those figures already are available to anyone with an interest and an internet connection. They have been for years.

CPPIB discloses all of its costs in its annual reports. The publication breaks out spending by external management fees ($947 million in FY2014), transaction costs ($216 million), operating expenses ($576 million), and compensation for seven executives (CEO Mark Wiseman earned $3.6 million), among other spending categories. Likewise, CPP’s annual reports give a full accounting of the cost of administrating Canada’s $288 billion pension system ($490 million).

Still, the highest-rated feedback—by far—asked, “In all that talk, I didn't see the most pertinent question answered: Relative to the performance of a passive system, adjusting for all costs and fees, does the current system beat (or not beat) the return?”


Once again, CPPIB has the disclosed the figures and Cross has done the arithmetic. Since the reference portfolio’s 2006 inception, active strategies have generated an excess $5 billion. Subtract all the fees—administrative plus investment—and Canada’s pensioners finish $3 billion richer.  So costs may be high, but the return is also high. The attacks are from a perspective that wants the government fund to fail, but it is routinely doing better than most private sector pension plans. The success of the program must be galling for those who want to downsize and privatize pensions for Canadians. 

One of the main resources Canadians rely on is the Canada Pension plan, and as long as it continues Canadians who have worked will have income when they retire.