Common

The things that you think are common like windy mornings, starry skies, and old trees; beetles, strawberries, and doorbells; coffee, blue jeans, and summertime... are not common. They are a reminder that life is precious and that we need to take every moment to enjoy the wonders around us.

One idea can enrich the world

One idea can enrich the world if it is acted on. Back in 1973, Volunteer Grandparents Society was founded by Marjorie Anderson, who was a working as a social worker in Vancouver. While manning the phone lines in the Crisis Centre, she received calls from numbers of families and elderly people who were without the benefits of extended family. With this in mind, she set out to establish a voluntary grandparenting program. Today that organisation connects older people with younger people to enrich both generations. They have an extensive program and our well established in BC, and they are providing a model of how to connect generations in other jurisdictions.

The Volunteer Grandparents Program, at Family Service Association, works to facilitate the creation and growth of extended families of choice throughout Metropolitan Toronto.

Started in 1991, the Volunteer Grandparents Program is an intergenerational matching program that is preventive in nature. Through the exchange of cultures, friendship and learning, the program promotes well-being, positive experiences and social supports between families with young children and older adults. The program welcomes and encourages the participation of families from all of Toronto's multicultural communities.

Modelled after the Volunteer Grandparents Society of British Columbia, the Volunteer Grandparents Program is the only program of its kind in Ontario. 

The program does not have one central location. Instead, its activities take place in the homes of the parents, the homes of the volunteer grandparents, or through community outings to the park, playground, zoo or library. Through a scrupulous screening process, healthy active adults (50+) are carefully matched with families that have at least one child who is between the ages of two and eight. Matches are monitored through regular, supportive contact with the Program Coordinator. Program members attend orientation and training sessions and participate in the program's development and operation as members of the Advisory Council and/or its working committees. There are large social events held throughout the year so that parents, children and volunteer grandparents can meet each other and share their knowledge and experience.

There are also many other moves to connect the generations, and the focus of each is different. In the US there is Foster Grandparents and this organisation provides Grandparents who are role models, mentors, and friends to children with exceptional needs. The program provides a way for volunteers age 55 and over to stay active by serving children and youth in their communities.

In 2010 the NorthWest Territories Senior Society launched an intergenerational program with the aims to bring people together in purposeful, mutually beneficial activities which promote greater understanding and respect between generations and contributes to building more cohesive communities. Intergenerational practice is inclusive, building on the positive resources that the young and old have to offer each other and those around them.

In Toronto there is the Intergenerational Partnerships (TIGP), which first came into existence in 1981 as a working group in Toronto’s Riverdale community, responding to the needs of two distinct groups – children and youth, and seniors.

Founded in 1986, TIGP has been the only non-profit charity mandated and funded to bringing generations and communities together through intergenerational programming across the GTA.

Why should we try to connect to the younger generation, because there are benefits to us? Benefits such as:

·       Improved life satisfaction

·       Enhanced self-esteem

·       Ongoing skills development

·       Feelings of continued usefulness and connectedness in the community

·       An opportunity to meet other caring and talented seniors

·       An opportunity to develop meaningful connections with children and youth that extend beyond family and acquaintances

There are also some benefits to the younger generation. Such as:

·       The development of healthy attitudes towards aging

·       Educational enrichment

·       Improved self-esteem and opportunity for leadership skill development

·       A strengthened sense of community and social responsibility

·       The promotion of culture, heritage and history

·       Intergenerational Programs Serve to Build Stronger Communities:

Needs and demographics of the senior population are changing and evolving. Seniors living in poverty, low and diverse literacy levels, isolation, health and social needs and abuse within an ageing and increasingly multi-cultural population are some of the main issues cited in current Statistics Canada information. It is shown that intergenerational contact contributes to:

·       Both the individual and the community’s health and well-being. Increases the mutual understanding, acceptance and support for each generation.

·       Improve the safety and security of neighbourhoods.

·       Statistics Canada’s socio-economic analysis of Health and Literacy Among Children Report demonstrates that the socio-economic environment remains an important determinant of health and that variables such as income and literacy continue to have a direct and indirect effect on people’s health status.

·       There is a relationship linking literacy and populations with high risk among senior citizens. This relationship tends to occur for all ages and both sexes.

·       The National Council on Aging in its "Seniors Independence: Whose Responsible", believes that government, individual families and groups in the community can collaborate to maintain seniors’ independence and autonomy and that within a supportive and complementary partnership, each can play a significant role.

Advice on Ageing

Many of us are between 65 and death, i.e. old. My cousin, Laurel send me this excellent article posted by Steven Korker written by Alan S Bame on ageing . . . and I have to agree it's good advice to follow. I'm particularly interested in tune with # 18 and 20.

1. It’s time to use the money you saved up. Use it and enjoy it. Don’t just keep it for those who may have no notion of the sacrifices you made to get it. Remember there is nothing more dangerous than a son or daughter-in-law with big ideas for your hard-earned capital. Warning: This is also a bad time for investments, even if it seems wonderful or fool-proof. They only bring problems and worries. This is a time for you to enjoy some peace and quiet.

2. Stop worrying about the financial situation of your children and grandchildren, and don’t feel bad spending your money on yourself. You’ve taken care of them for many years, and you’ve taught them what you could. You gave them an education, food, shelter and support. The responsibility is now theirs to earn their own money.

3. Keep a healthy life, without great physical effort. Do moderate exercise (like walking every day), eat well and get your sleep. It’s easy to become sick, and it gets harder to remain healthy. That is why you need to keep yourself in good shape and be aware of your medical and physical needs. Keep in touch with your doctor, do tests even when you’re feeling well. Stay informed.

4. Always buy the best, most beautiful items for your significant other. The key goal is to enjoy your money with your partner. One day one of you will miss the other, and the money will not provide any comfort then, enjoy it together.

5. Don’t stress over the little things. You’ve already overcome so much in your life. You have good memories and bad ones, but the important thing is the present. Don’t let the past drag you down and don’t let the future frighten you. Feel good in the now. Small issues will soon be forgotten.

6. Regardless of age, always keep love alive. Love your partner, love life, love your family, love your neighbour and remember: “A man is not old as long as he has intelligence and affection.”

7. Be proud, both inside and out. Don’t stop going to your hair salon or barber, do your nails, go to the dermatologist and the dentist, keep your perfumes and creams well stocked. When you are well-maintained on the outside, it seeps in, making you feel proud and strong.

8. Don’t lose sight of fashion trends for your age, but keep your own sense of style. There’s nothing worse than an older person trying to wear the current fashion among youngsters. You’ve developed your own sense of what looks good on you – keep it and be proud of it. It’s part of who you are.

9. ALWAYS stay up-to-date. Read newspapers, watch the news. Go online and read what people are saying. Make sure you have an active email account and try to use some of those social networks. You’ll be surprised what old friends you’ll meet. Keeping in touch with what is going on and with the people you know is important at any age.

10. Respect the younger generation and their opinions. They may not have the same ideals as you, but they are the future and will take the world in their direction. Give advice, not criticism, and try to remind them that yesterday’s wisdom still applies today.

11. Never use the phrase: “In my time.” Your time is now. As long as you’re alive, you are part of this time. You may have been younger, but you are still you now, having fun and enjoying life.

12. Some people embrace their golden years, while others become bitter and surly. Life is too short to waste your days on the latter. Spend your time with positive, cheerful people, it’ll rub off on you and your days will seem that much better. Spending your time with bitter people will make you older and harder to be around.

13. Do not surrender to the temptation of living with your children or grandchildren (if you have a financial choice, that is). Sure, being surrounded by family sounds great, but we all need our privacy. They need theirs and you need yours. If you’ve lost your partner (our deepest condolences), then find a person to move in with you and help out. Even then, do so only if you feel you really need the help or do not want to live alone.

14. Don’t abandon your hobbies. If you don’t have any, make new ones. You can travel, hike, cook, read, dance. You can adopt a cat or a dog, grow a garden, play cards, checkers, chess, dominoes, golf. You can paint, volunteer or just collect certain items. Find something you like and spend some real time having fun with it.

15. Even if you don’t feel like it, try to accept invitations. Baptisms, graduations, birthdays, weddings, conferences. Try to go. Get out of the house, meet people you haven’t seen in a while, experience something new (or something old). But don’t get upset when you’re not invited. Some events are limited by resources, and not everyone can be hosted. The important thing is to leave the house from time to time. Go to museums, go walk through a field. Get out there.

16. Be a conversationalist. Talk less and listen more. Some people go on and on about the past, not caring if their listeners are really interested. That’s a great way of reducing their desire to speak with you. Listen first and answer questions, but don’t go off into long stories unless asked to. Speak in courteous tones and try not to complain or criticize too much unless you really need to. Try to accept situations as they are. Everyone is going through the same things, and people have a low tolerance for hearing complaints. Always find some good things to say as well.

17. Pain and discomfort go hand in hand with getting older. Try not to dwell on them but accept them as a part of the cycle of life we’re all going through. Try to minimise them in your mind. They are not who you are, they are something that life added to you. If they become your entire focus, you lose sight of the person you used to be.

18. If you’ve been offended by someone – forgive them. If you’ve offended someone - apologise. Don’t drag around resentment with you. It only serves to make you sad and bitter. It doesn’t matter who was right. Someone once said: “Holding a grudge is like taking poison and expecting the other person to die.” Don’t take that poison. Forgive, forget and move on with your life.

19. If you have a strong belief, savour it. But don’t waste your time trying to convince others. They will make their own choices no matter what you tell them, and it will only bring you frustration. Live your faith and set an example. Live true to your beliefs and let that memory sway them.

20. Laugh. Laugh A LOT. Laugh at everything. Remember, you are one of the lucky ones. You managed to have a life, a long one. Many never get to this age, never get to experience a full life. But you did. So what’s not to laugh about? Find the humour in your situation.

21. Take no notice of what others say about you and even less notice of what they might be thinking. They’ll do it anyway, and you should have pride in yourself and what you’ve achieved. Let them talk and don’t worry. They have no idea about your history, your memories and the life you’ve lived so far. There’s still much to be written, so get busy writing and don’t waste time thinking about what others might think. Now is the time to be at rest, at peace and as happy as you can be!

AND, as Alan's message suggests. REMEMBER: “Life is too short to drink bad wine.” Or, in my case, bad Arnold Palmer.

A test for men, that women will enjoy as well

This is a test for men only and all "real men" will answer "C" to all of these questions. However, women will also benefit by reviewing them, so that they get to understand men and thereby enrich their own lives.

1. Alien beings from a highly advanced society visit the Earth, and you are the first human they encounter. As a token of intergalactic friendship, they present you with a small but incredibly sophisticated device that is capable of curing all disease, providing an infinite supply of clean energy, wiping out hunger and poverty, and permanently eliminating oppression and violence all over the entire earth. You decide to:

A.  Present it to the President of the United States.

B.  Present it to the Secretary General of the United Nations.

C.  Take it apart to see how it works.

2. As you grow older, what lost quality of your youthful life do you miss the most?

A.  Innocence

B.  Idealism

C.  Cherry bombs.

  

3. When is it okay to kiss another male?

A.  When you wish to display simple and pure affection without   regard for narrow-minded social conventions.

B.  When he is the Pope (but not on the lips)!

C.  When he is your brother and you are Al Pacino and this is the   only really sportsmanlike way to let him know that, for   business reasons, you have to have him killed.

  

4. In your opinion, the ideal pet is:

A.  A cat.

B.  A dog.

C.  A dog that eats cats.

 5. You have been seeing a woman for several years. She's attractive and intelligent, and you always enjoy being with her. One leisurely Sunday afternoon the two of you are taking it easy. You're watching a football game; she's reading the papers when she suddenly, out of the clear blue sky, tells you that she thinks she really loves you, but, she can no longer bear the uncertainty of not knowing where your relationship is going. She says she's not asking whether you want to get married; only whether you believe that you have some kind of future together. What do you say?

A.  That you sincerely believe the 2 of you do have a future, but   you don't want to rush it.

B.  That although you also have strong feelings for her, you can't honestly say that you'll be ready anytime soon to make a   lasting commitment, and you don't want to hurt her by holding   out false hope.

C.  That you cannot believe the Cowboys called a draw play on third   and 17.

  

6. Okay, so you have decided that you truly love a woman and you want to spend the rest of your life with her, sharing the joys and the sorrows the world has to offer, come what may. How do you tell her?

A.  You take her to a nice restaurant and tell her after dinner.

B.  You take her for a walk on a moonlit beach, and you say her   name, and when she turns to you, with the sea breeze blowing   through her hair and the stars in her eyes, you tell her.

C.  Tell her what?

 7. One weekday morning your wife wakes up feeling ill and asks you to get your 3 children ready for school. Your first question to her is:

A.  "Do they need to eat or anything?"

B.  "They're in school already?"

C.  "We have 3 of them?"

  

8. When is it okay to throw away a set of veteran underwear?

A.  When it has turned the color of a dead whale and developed new   holes so large that you're not sure which ones were originally   intended for your legs.

B.  When it is down to 8 loosely connected underwear molecules and   has to be handled with tweezers.

C.  It is never okay to throw away veteran underwear. A real guy   checks the garbage regularly in case somebody, and we are not   naming names, (but this would be his wife) is quietly trying to   discard his underwear.

  

9. What is the human race's single greatest achievement?

A.  Democracy.

B.  Religion.

C.  Remote control.

  

10. What, in your opinion, is the most reasonable explanation for the fact that Moses led the Israelite's all over the place for 40 years before they finally got to the Promised Land?

A.  He was being tested.

B.  He wanted them to really appreciate the Promised Land when they finally got there.

C.      He refused to ask for directions.