The hardest words

We faced a lot of hard moments in our life. As we raised our family, dealt with life’s issues, and tried to be upstanding citizens from youth to retirement, we have many memories of which we are proud. But anyone who has successfully come to their senior years also has a few relationships and moments that they are not proud of as well.

One of the hardest things to admit is that we ever were wrong. But the chances are that by this stage in our life, we can look back and think of times when we did mistreated people, where we were in the wrong and were not honest or ethical or moral in some aspect of life. I know when I look back; I have had those moments. But in the middle of a struggle, when we behave shamefully, it’s easy to just get past it, bury it in our mind and let the passage of time wipe away that memory. It is easy to do, but not something we should not do.

But our senior years are about more than just trips, meeting with friends and sleeping until noon. It is also about reviewing the life you lived and celebrating the joys and successes you have had. But to be honest with yourself, you cannot rejoice in the good without remembering those times when you were the one doing wrong and the people you hurt and the damage that was caused by your mistakes.

Facing life after retirement is about putting your affairs in order so you can live out the balance of your days with a peaceful mind and a happy heart. Most times, all that you have to do to resolve a mistake you made or to fix a broken relationship is to be prepared to say the two hardest words there are in the English language. And those words are–I’m sorry.  

It would be a shame that would border on a Shakespearian tragedy if you looked back at your life and identified those broken relationships that were caused by your pride, your impetuous activity, or your greed. Some of those relationships may be very important to you and to leave them broken as you move into your retirement years is more than just a shame. It’s unimaginable. So how do you go about saying you’re sorry and saying “I’m sorry” to someone with whom the relationship ended a long time ago? Friends come and go, but family is with you forever, and most families have fought and many ends up lasting a lifetime. In my family, my grandmother and her sisters did not speak for over 50 years, and they died without resolving whatever conflict happened. Family fights and broken family relationships hurt not only the family members involved, but they also hurt many more, including cousins, other siblings, nieces, nephews, grandchildren, etc.

Perhaps the easiest way to accomplish this very hard part of setting your affairs in order is to work through someone who can help make it happen. Perhaps another family member can be of help. Another sibling may mend this family rift and be happy to see that relationship restored. If you can call that sister who still loves you and still loves your brother, she may help soften the hurt feelings and be the mediator between two hurt brothers who are desperate to be reconciled.

You can bet that it would thrill your sister to be the one to bring you two together. This is just one example of a way to reach out and say the hardest words ever to fix a mistake you made in life. It’s a way to reach out to that person you hurt and just say, “I’m sorry”, which is what I had wished my grandmother and her sisters could have done.

Food Prices are getting higher what can we do?

One of the things that takes some getting used to is living on a fixed income.  And even if you have a healthy retirement, investments, and government benefits, when you stop working, your income comes out of that pile of money which is except for the government benefit, a diminishing bucket of funds.  So, anything you can do to protect your money and economize means your money will last longer, be there for you when you have an emergency or be available for fun things which is what retirement is all about.

If you are able to continue to prepare your own food, you are already well ahead of the game because one big expense for any budget is the food budget.  And if you are buying food for a spouse, older children still at home or you are helping to raise the grandkids, you can see a food budget that can get out of control.  So, it pays to come up with some tips for how to slash that food budget but do so in a way that does not hurt the quality of food you eat or feed your family.

Economy begins at home so you can do a lot before you even go to the grocery store by learning to use everything you buy.  An investment in some quality storage units so you can keep leftovers fresh or keep fresh vegetables or fruits on hand will help you eat everything you buy and cut down on waste.  In fact, if you like to garden, you can even take the organic waste such as coffee grounds and apple cores and make your own compost which can go into your garden to grow your own food next spring. 

The key to saving money at the grocery store is to be a smart shopper.  Remember that grocery stores stock lots of items that are made to appeal to people who want convenience over low prices.  You can save a lot of money by avoiding fast foods, frozen foods and buying the ingredients to make your own meals every day.

Being a smart shopper also means knowing when and where to shop and how to find the good values in food and grocery supplies at the store.  Some core principles of smart shopping are…

·   If you can buy in bulk – do it.  Most items are cheaper at the unit cost level if you buy larger quantities.  If you can buy and store more food at once, you can take advantage of those savings.

·   Avoid impulse purchases.  Stores carefully place items that are appealing so you will buy higher-priced items.  Work from a list and stick to your list.

·   Slice your own cheese.  Pre-sliced cheese comes at a higher price.  Buy a good cheese knife and buy cheese in blocks and slice it yourself.

·   Buy fresh produce.  Fresh foods are not only better for you, and they are cheaper than frozen. 

·   Know your town.  Each grocery store has certain categories they do best at outselling the others.  Know what stores are good with produce, with meat and with everyday savings and create your shopping lists accordingly.

·   Know your store.  Each week, your store marks down certain items in preparation for the weekend.  Routinely they will slash the prices of fresh meat to get rid of last week’s supply in preparation for the higher-priced specials for this week. If you know when that stuff hits the shelves, you can score big savings and freeze what you buy to use over the next few weeks.

·   Know your items.  Learn your price points of what is a good price for each item on your list.  Try to buy under those price points so your budget is controlled.

·   Buy store brands.

·   Use coupons.

·   Leave the grandkids home.  Children will add dozens of items to your shopping cart and slow you down.  Leave them out of the picture and you won’t have to buy their impulse items and the trip will go faster too.

By being a smart shopper, you can stretch your food budget and see an impressive savings on what you spend on groceries.  And that helps you stretch your retirement savings which means a longer more prosperous retirement and one that is more worry free as well.  And that is worth the extra effort.

Some good news

Some good news that we may have overlooked because of the Pandemic

In 2021 Defined Pension funds came through the pandemic in surprisingly good health, with solvency funding levels at new highs thanks to rebounding equity markets and high long-term bond yields.

The pandemic has enhanced the case for DB pensions among an increasingly mobile workforce and the employers looking to attract and retain them.

The pandemic has proved a net positive for the popularity of Defined Benefit Plans, with the void left by distracted employers more than filled by fresh expressions of interest from organizations looking to satisfy employees newly confined to home offices.  Employers want to put their money where their mouth is to retain employees because the mobile workforce can now work for anyone, Employers are turning the corner. They’re all saying employees are their most important asset, so having an ineffective pension system or none at all doesn’t really resonate

Canadians are now establishing a good financial foundation right now — setting out financial goals and saving for them. We are taking a step in the right direction to make real financial progress. If this momentum continues, Canada will be poised for a stronger second half of the year.

Despite the financial challenges experienced by Canadians over the course of the coronavirus pandemic, 40 percent said they’ve continued to save for retirement, according to a new survey by life insurance provider Policy Me Corp.

More than half (54 percent) of survey respondents said they’re adding to their emergency funds, while 48 percent are paying down debt and 45 percent are making regular contributions to their savings. On average, Canadians put 21 percent of their income into savings and investments.

In addition, 67 percent said they feel in control of their finances and 65 percent described themselves as “financially resilient.” In 2021, survey respondents who described themselves as “financially resilient” were more likely to have paid off their mortgage (89 percent), made regular contributions to a registered education savings plan (84 percent) or a registered retirement savings plan or tax-free savings account (78 percent), consulted with a financial advisor (75 percent) and made a will or updated their end-of-life plans (72 percent).

 However, there is still widespread concern,  42 percent said they felt more financially stressed in 2021 compared to the previous year and households with children (47 percent) were more likely to experience financial stress than those without children (39 percent). Half (51 percent) said they had to pull money from their savings or investments in order to afford the unforeseen expense

New retirement trend

 In a previous post I referred to the fact that in the United States most people aspire to retire at age 62, but they actually partially retire at age 65 and fully retire about 70. This trend has been slowed down by the Pandemic as another trend that’s emerging is that people retire while they still have their health at the expense of their lifestyles and future security.

The last two years have put people in a new mindset for what they want for their future. Many people who were 10-plus years away from a traditional age 65 retirement are now looking at how they can phase-out of the workforce with a longer runway. That means looking at their needs and wants and deciding to scale back to 80% to 90% as early as their mid-50s. This trend may continue as people place value on being able to enjoy their life now while their health is good and they are financially able, as opposed to waiting until later when there might be a lot more unknowns — health being the biggest unknown for many people and remember in the United States one of the biggest causes of personal bankruptcy in medical issues, and unless they change their health care funding model that will not change soon.

Young people who grew up in the age of rideshare drivers and Etsy stores will carry the mindset of side-hustle culture for the rest of their lives into retirement and that mindset is brand new in American history.

Past generations have always been either working or retired, with no middle ground. Future generations will have a spectrum to choose from. For example, if someone decides they want more time, then options like gig work, consulting and more will mean their lifestyle can scale as they see fit.