Time for some humour

My aunt's beloved cat Ginger had grown seriously overweight, so, she decided to take him to the vet to find out if there was anything wrong with him - and more to the point, whether anything could be done about it. So, she put him into the kitty-carry box and drove to the surgery. The doc prescribed a course of pills, and my aunt left, happy in the knowledge that Ginger would soon be his slim old self again.

But after a few weeks of taking the pills, there was no change: Ginger was as fat as ever. Soon months had gone by, and still, there was no difference. In fact, if anything, it was getting worse. The other problem was the invoices from the vet, these pills were costing a fortune. It soon became clear to us all that Ginger had become a doc-billed fatty puss.

Opportunity may knock once, but the temptation bangs on your front door

Forever

For every person with a spark of genius, there are a hundred with ignition trouble.

Car accidents are not always easy to explain, as evidenced by the following insurance form statements written and submitted by the unlucky drivers themselves:

Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't have.

I thought my window was down, but I found out that it was up when I put my head through it.

In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.

The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big mouth.

What do you call a fish with no eyes? ... A fsh

I thought about making a fitness movie, for folks my age and call it "Pumping Rust."

There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.

I try not to let my mind wander...It is too small and fragile to be out by itself.

Quotes about reading from TED talks

I am a viewer and a reader of TED talks they always give new perspectives or new ideas to think about. Reading is an important part of how I learn so when I saw the following quotes on reading, I thought I would share.

How do we diminish the distance between us? Reading is one way to close that distance. It gives us a quiet universe that we can share together, that we can share in equally.”

— Michelle Kuo, from the TED Talk: The healing power of reading

“NASA has this phrase that they like: ‘Failure is not an option.’ But failure has to be an option in art and in exploration because it’s a leap of faith. And no important endeavour that required innovation was done without risk. You have to be willing to take those risks. So, that’s the thought I would leave you with, is that in whatever you’re doing, a failure is an option, but fear is not.”

— James Cameron, from the TED Talk: Before Avatar, a curious boy

“The moment kids start to lie is the moment storytelling begins. They are talking about things they didn’t see. It’s amazing. It’s a wonderful moment. Parents should celebrate. ‘Hurray! My boy finally started to lie!’”

— Young-ha Kim, from the TED Talk: Be an artist, right now!

 “Publication and temporary creative successes are something you have to recover from. They kill as many people as not. They will hurt, damage and change you in ways you cannot imagine. The most degraded and evil people I’ve ever known are male writers who’ve had huge best sellers. And yet … it’s also a miracle to get your work published, to get your stories read and heard. Just try to bust yourself gently of the fantasy that publication will heal you, that it will fill the Swiss-cheese-y holes inside of you. It can’t. It won’t. But writing can.”

— Anne Lamott, from the TED Talk: 12 truths I learned from life and writing

“We’ve got truth and lies and then there’s this little space, the edge, in the middle. That liminal space, that’s art.”

— Mac Barnett, from the TED Talk: Why a good book is a secret door

“Stories cannot demolish frontiers, but they can punch holes in our mental walls. And through those holes, we can get a glimpse of the other, and sometimes even like what we see.”

— Elif Shafak, from the TED Talk: The politics of fiction

“The world is changed by our maps of the world. The way that we choose … also shapes the map of our lives, and that in turn shapes our lives. I believe that what we map changes the life we lead. And I don’t mean that in some … you-can-think-your-way-out-of-cancer sense. But I do believe that while maps don’t show you where you will go in your life, they show you where you might go. You very rarely go to a place that isn’t on your personal map.”

— John Green, from the TED Talk: The nerd’s guide to learning everything online

“I’m a storyteller. I want to convey something that is truer than the truth about our common humanity. All stories interest me, and some haunt me until I end up writing them.”

— Isabel Allende, from the TED Talk: Isabel Allende tells tales of passion

Gender wealth gap hurts all

An editorial in the Baltimore Sun addressed the issue of the wealth gap between men and women. The editorial addresses some but not all of the issues that lead to this problem. As the editorial board stated: The wealth gap, a consequence of realities women face throughout their lives, leaves women experiencing financial hardship and distress at a disproportionately higher rate than men. Financial hardship is often a precursor to emotional distress and physical ailment, with cascading negative implications.

What is meant by the gender wealth gap? It refers to the difference in accumulated financial resources between men and women. 

Some of life’s difficulties that apply and hurt women more so than men are, divorce, single parenthood, caring for ageing parents or ill spouses, disability, and the inevitabilities of old age, and widowhood. Women who face these issues understand that each of them can wreak havoc, practical, economic, emotional and physical on their life and plan. 

Underlying the issues is the fact that women earn less and thus accumulate less wealth than men. This leads to a wealth gap that has the potential to and often does increase the devastation for women. 

Raising awareness that women earn less may catalyzing remedial action both individual action and action by policymakers. The burden of having women who are older living in poverty is not exclusively borne by the individual; it ripples through families and communities.

A recent study cited by Barron’s concluded that the lifetime gender wealth gap could translate to a difference of greater than $1 million in accumulated wealth. While the actual dollar amount will vary by individual and circumstance, the gender wealth gap exists across the socioeconomic spectrum.

One significant reason is that women earn less than men by about 20% for the same work. A 20% income differential, compounded over a lifetime, translates to significant accumulated wealth differential. While understanding all the causes of gender income disparity is essential before drawing conclusions about pay equity, we know that the gap exists and places many women at a financial disadvantage. Also, by choice or necessity, women assume the lion’s share of family caregiving, either staying home to raise children or interrupting careers to care for children, grandchildren, ageing parents and spouses. 

Less pay and intermittent work translate to less accumulated social security and fewer retirement savings and pension plans. And while nonworking spouses may be entitled to a portion of future Social Security and pension/retirement streams earned by working spouses, the sad reality is 40-50% of marriages in the U.S. end in divorce. 

Divorce can take a heavy financial toll on the finances of both spouses, but typically more on women who stayed home to raise children. Years out of the workforce likely means reentering at a lower salary level in the same industry or accepting any job to pay the bills. According to a report by the U.S. Government Accountability Office, women’s household income decreased by 41% post-divorce — almost twice the decline that men experience.

Women’s orientation around money is more likely to be focused on earnings and a living budget, and less likely to be focused on strategic financial planning and long-term investing. 

Finally, women in the U.S. live an average of five years longer than men. This “longevity factor” means assets must last for a longer time frame for women. It also means women are more likely to need long-term care (70% of nursing home residents are women).

This confluence of events — caregiving, systemic income disparity, societal realities, longevity — contributes to the gender wealth gap, with women experiencing some form of financial inequity in their lives in disproportionate numbers. In fact, women consistently name financial hardship as a major life concern, and in women over 50, fear of financial dependence is ranked a top fear. Many worry about outliving their savings or being a burden to loved ones in retirement. That fear causes anxiety, and it can compromise physical well-being.

We need to continue to fight for equal pay for women so that the women we work with and care for do not have the fear and anxiety they currently have.

When starting something new

As we move through the stages of retirement, it is, in my humble opinion, a good idea to try new things, listen to new ideas, try new adventures. Change is unsettling and frightening but after the initial adjustments change can be fun. To help adjust to change or to start the new adventure or beginning the new thing requires a change in attitude and a change in perception. 

As we get older it takes longer to learn new stuff, that is a reality for us, it does not mean we cannot learn, it just means it takes us longer to learn. The first step is to understand that you need to shake the burden that comes from seeing your baby steps, as a necessary discipline.

See these steps as a process of learning. Think of these needed steps in your progress as optional dance moves, in life's conga line or if you like life's new line dance. These baby steps are required now just as much as they were when we were learning to walk. 

Take some time and watch a toddler learning to walk, they are determined, excited and do not give up, no matter how many times they fall. Toddlers, I think at some level, understand the baby steps they are taking spark miracle, open floodgates, and lead to the near-effortless manifestations of change.

As we age, we need to hold on to the idea that we can learn that we had when we were toddlers and children. If we have lost it we need to find a way to rekindle that flame that allowed us to live a full, exciting and meaningful life. Just because we are in the final phase of life, does not mean that we should lose that spark that pushed us when we were young. There is so much to see and do and so little time to do it.