Saturday, January 4, 2014
Stress Free Relationships in Retirement:
Does it seem difficult to find the time for your relationship? Relationships change when one person is retired, and this may cause you and your partner stress?
How can you prevent this feeling of “being overwhelmed” because of the changes that retirement brings from affecting your relationship?
Below are some tips to help couples manage their time, feel more relaxed, have fun and keep that spark ignited in their marriage every day.
Tip #1 Practice good self-care: Eat right and get enough rest. Do something special for yourself and as a couple every day, even if for only 10 minutes. I suggest couples take that 10 minutes before falling asleep at night to share how much they appreciate each other and be grateful for what was accomplished during the day versus focusing on what was not.
Tip #2 Plan Ahead: Create a workable schedule together to get everything important done. Ask yourself: Does this really need to be done today? Would anyone be affected if we did not do it? If the answer is ‘yes’ to either question, then it is a priority. Take care of priority items first, and then do other less important things. Plan ahead and take a vacation or personal day midweek to enjoy some quiet time together.
Tip #3 Forget perfection: Don’t create stress by trying to achieve the perfect situation. Focus on what brings more ease into your lives. Keep it simple.
Tip #4 Laugh and have fun: Have a sense of humor and don’t take yourself so seriously. Lighten up and have fun together. Keep on laughing. Laughter not only helps defuse stress, it helps reduce blood pressure, relax muscle tension, release natural pain relievers, and boost your immune system. It will also help with your sex life.
Tip #5 Learn to say ‘no’: It really is OK to say ‘no’ to things you do not have time for or don’t have an interest in participating. If you’re saying yes because you’re worried about what someone might say, you’ll feel resentful and out of control. Be true to yourself and to each other. Say ‘maybe’ to check in with each other and then make the decision.
Good communication and honoring both partner’s schedules is always essential.
Bonus: Both of you are unique. Learn to appreciate and respect what you both bring to the relationship and get to know your partner all over again. Falling in love to the same person is wonderful for both.