If you want to live a life with few regrets, follow these 43 life
lessons, penned by H. Jackson Brown.
In the Fall of 1990, Mr. Brown sat at his kitchen table, pulled out a pad of
paper and began writing advice to his son, who had just entered college.
Mr. Brown’s aphorisms eventually evolved into twenty one books, including four
New York Times bestsellers. With Life’s Little Instruction Book, Mr. Brown
became the first author to simultaneously hold the number one positions on both
of the NYT’s hardback and paperback lists.
Some of Mr. Brown’s quotes have become so well known that they are often
mis-attributed to historical figures, including the following, which is widely
credited to Mark Twain: “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by
the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do.
So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade
winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”
As James Clear notes in The #1 Regret Of Dying Patients, far too many people
spend their final stage of life regretting their youthful choices. Mr. Brown’s
advice will help you to, “live a good, honorable life which you can enjoy a
second time when you are old.”
When read nearly twenty-five years after they were penned, some of Mr. Brown’s
musing are anachronisms (e.g., “Don’t sit while ladies are standing”), while
others are banal (“Turn off the tap when brushing your teeth”).
However, the vast majority of the 1,560 quotations in Volumes I – III of Life’s
Little Instruction Book, are clever, relevant and inspirational.
Below are 43 quotes in bold text which are relevant to business executives who
want to live a regret-free life. I categorized the quotes by: aspiration,
kindness, leadership, success and happiness.
In a few instances, I have slightly paraphrased Mr. Brown’s original text – my
apologies to Mr. Brown and his purist fans.
Aspire
1. Never give up when
you truly believe. The person with big dreams is more powerful than the one
with all the facts – the smartest person in the room seldom beats the one with
the most passion.
2. Believe in love at
first sight – be open to instant infatuation with respect to both people and
business idea
3. Never laugh at
anyone’s dreams – no one has the right to opine upon someone else’s desired
future because no one can attest to the validity of an unrealized dream.
4. Find a job you like
and you add five days to every week – I often tell my children), “I never
worked at day at my startups because we were having too much fun.” Admittedly,
not every day was a carnival, but I certainly enjoyed the majority of my
startup workdays.
5. Every so often, let
your spirit of adventure triumph over your good sense – good judgment arises
from mistakes, mistakes arise from bad judgment. Thus, a bit of occasional bad
judgment is good for you.
6. Great love and great
achievements involve great risk – nothing ventured, nothing gained. Go venture.
7. Never let the odds
keep you from pursuing what you know in your heart you were meant to do –
entrepreneurs never calculate probabilities, even if the chances are one in a
million, “one” is all you need to win.
8. Never deprive anyone
(including yourself) of hope, it might be all they have
9. Be the first to say,
“Hello” – always set a friendly tone with a warm smile, a hearty handshake and
a robust greeting.
10. Buy whatever kids are
selling on card tables in their front yard – and let them keep the change.
11. Be kinder than
necessary – there is an infinite supply of kindness, so don’t fear depleting
it.
12. Give people a second
chance, but not a third – be nice, but not stupid.
13. Be tough minded but
tenderhearted – hold people accountable, but consider uncontrollable factors
that impact someone’s performance.
14. Every so often, push
your luck – push your luck slowly and deliberately, but be ready to quickly
pull back, as you often won’t know you have pushed your luck too far, until
after the fact.
15. Win without boasting,
lose without excuses – internalize your failures and externalize your
victories.
16. When lending people
money, be sure their character exceeds their collateral – honesty matters, both
yours and those with whom you associate.
17. It’s not your job to
get people to like you, it’s your job to like people – you can only control
your own actions and feelings, don’t try to control those of others.
18. Never resist a
generous impulse – if you hesitate, you’ll quickly rationalize a dozen reasons
to act charitably… later. Unfortunately, “later” rarely arrives.
19. Fight fairly. Give
generously. Laugh loudly. Love deeply.
Lead
20. Become someone’s hero
– when someone asks you to be their mentor, smile and say, “I would be
honored.”
21. Do your homework and
know your facts, but remember it’s passion that persuades – history is filled
with passionate leaders, I know of none that were unemotional.
22. Ask someone you’d
like to know to list five people they would most like to meet. It will tell you
a lot about them – consider using this as an interviewing technique, you might
be surprised by your candidates’ responses.
23. The shortest way to
get anywhere is to have good company – one of the reasons I enjoyed my startups
so much is that I had the pleasure of working with fantastic teams comprised of
smart, dedicated and kind people.
24. Share your knowledge
and you become immortal – mentoring matters, convey your insights freely to
those who seek them.
25. Everyone wears an
invisible sign that reads “Notice me. Make me feel important.” – ask people
questions about their passions and achievements, almost no one can resist this
temptation to talk about themselves.
26. Hire people more for
their judgment than for their talents – forget resumes and hire based on
attitude and aptitude.
27. When there’s a piano
to be moved, don’t reach for the stool – lead by example, never ask someone to
do a task you would not do yourself.
28. Once a month, go to
lunch with someone who knows more about your business than you do – you are
never too old, too smart or too successful to be a protégé.
29. Celebrate even small
victories – create a culture of celebration by publically praising achievements
that would otherwise not be visible to your team.
30. Plant more flowers
than you pick
Succeed
31. Learn to listen.
Opportunity sometimes knocks very softly – everyone experiences several “big
breaks” during their careers. Unfortunately, most people fail to recognize them
when they occur.
32. Strive for
excellence, not perfection – activity beats contemplation seven days a week.
33. Judge your success by
the degree you are enjoying your peace, health and love – nurture all three of
these treasures to the point of abundance.
34. Judge your success by
what you had to give up to get it – as noted above, not even the entire world
is ample payment for your soul.
35. Remember that winners
do what losers don’t want to do – outwork your competition and you will likely
win.
36. Grind it out. Hanging
on just one second longer than your competition makes you the winner – outlast
your competition, survival is often what separates the winners from the losers.
37. Take care of your
reputation. It’s your most valuable asset – honesty is a serial entrepreneur’s
most potent weapon.
38. Watch for big
problems. They disguise big opportunities – great entrepreneurs turn challenges
into breakthrough innovations. Embrace problems, never flee from them.
39. Earn your success
based on service to others, not at the expense of others
Be Happy
40. Happiness is not
based on possessions, power or prestige, but on relationships with people you
love and respect – if you doubt this wisdom, consider all the rich, powerful
and famous people who are miserable.
41. After you’ve work
hard to get what you want, take the time to enjoy it – in Startup Life, Brad
Feld advises entrepreneurs to spend 10% of the proceeds of a financial windfall
on something frivolous. What’s the point of accumulating capital if you never
derive pleasure from it?
42. Don’t think you can
relax yourself to happiness. Happiness comes as a result of doing – as David
Pink has noted, most people are motivated by mastery, autonomy and purpose.
These needs are heightened with inactivity, which is why most happily retired
people have active lives.
43. Be happy with what
you have while working for what you want
There is obviously no assurance that you will live a regret-free life if
you abide by Mr. Brown’s clever aphorisms. However, if you follow his advice to
“Explore, Dream, Discover,” your life may be full of successes, failures, joys
and heartbreaks, but maybe it will also be devoid of regrets.
