Every day is a good day

One of the people I work with said to me this morning that everyday that she is breathing is a good day, and laughed. I have been very lucky in my life to have met and worked with some wonderful people who have had to overcome many illnesses. Many of these people believe that having a good attitude helped them survive and defeat the illness that they faced. I believe they are partially correct, attitude is an important part of how we deal with life.

I counsel that we cannot control how others behave, all we can do is control how we react to the behaviour. However, if one is sick, or tired, or depressed then our ability to control our own reactions are limited. I have a friend who believes that balance is one of the four (Spirituality, Health, Relationships and Work) important aspects of life. Easy to say, hard to do, I am not a spiritual person, so I find it hard to work that aspect into the balance that I seek. I strive to balance, relationships, health, and work so perhaps I am not a square, but a triangle. I think the ideal of spirituality residing outside of one's self is interesting but not relevant to many of my generation. I believe that if one should seek spirituality within, by the way we see ourselves and how we interact with others and our environment. Many of us are on the phenomenal plane and in the pursuit of pleasure, but the pursuit of pleasure sometimes brings pain. Maybe we should be searching for Bliss.

The Buddhist quote for the day: On the phenomenal plane we seek pleasure and the avoidance of pain. On the noumenal plane we know the absence of both - which is Bliss. - Why Lazurus Laughed by Wei Wu Wei...

Boomers turning 66--it is not the end of the world

There will be some interest, I think in the fact that the first of the Baby Boomers turn 66 this year and the pundits and those who want to make more about the aging of the boomers will carry on a conversations that are of little interest to us. The Beatles had a song about turning 64, but the song is about the sustaining of relationships not growing old. The lyrics are about how to keep love alive and the need we have to know that the relationship we are in is the correct one for us.

I had an interesting conversation the other day with three young colleagues (two men and one woman), it was after school and they were talking about how to know if a relationship was good and what they could do to maintain. I was asked my views and I suspect they thought that they thought with the wisdom of age I would have the answer. Sorry to disappoint but we as boomers value relationships, but many of us are not good at keeping them. All I could talk about is the following:

The idea is that we need to be honest to our selves about what we want and what we need, at an emotional, physical, and intellectual level. To find out what we need requires hard thought, and self investigation and is not something that is done easily. However, once you have spent the time and energy to find these things about yourself then be honest and communicate using "I language" to your partner what you need. It may be that your partner cannot give you what you need at this time in your life. If this is the case move on. This is easy to say but hard to do, however if you want to be happy then you may have to make tough decisions about the type of relationship you want.

Back to the Beatles, I saw the Beatles when they came to Vancouver in the 60's and enjoyed the show and love their music still today. Boomers may hold on to old memories but we find ways to make them come alive today. Music was an important part of my life and I have talked about this in an ealier post.

Life is a highway

I left Langley, BC at 3:00 to go to a meeting n Coquitlam and the freeway was backed up to 192nd street so I decided to take the Golden Ears Bridge to save time. No problems on the bridge, I get to the turnoff to Lougheed Highway West off the bridge and the traffic is stopped. I realized I had made a big mistake.  I hear later that there was a serious car accident on the route I had decided to take and the highway was closed to West Bound and only one lane East Bound was getting through. So being creative and innovative I  decided to go the back roads, without realizing I was now making a bigger mistake.

I made my meeting at 5:00 only one hour late, (a one hour trip had turned into two hours, mostly because of decisions I had made)  lucky for me the group had not quite finished. Life is like that sometimes, we think we are taking a short cut and it takes us longer to get to where we want to be.
After I realized I was not going to be able to get out of the situation, I did take the opportunity to relax, listen to the music, think about life, and examine the beautiful roadside flowers and greenery.

I was edging forward, at a very slow pace, and perhaps sometimes we have to do this, or life or our bodies will say to us, time for a breakdown, and then we can recover and move on but slowly. Life in the fast lane is for us Boomers but sometimes we have to relax and take some time in the slow lane. Keep on Trucking

Marketing to Boomers

In one of the Blogs I read Boomers--A trip into the heart of the Boomers, the author Brent Green, talks about a speech he gave in Florida to a Boomer conference geared to business men and women who want to learn to market to us. I was struck by the following statements:

Individual men may feel powerless against external forces of unemployment, layoffs, downsizing and chronic diseases. But when a generation of men known to challenge authority confronts this evolving life-stage, transformative beliefs and actions can emerge. A generation of men that embraced feminism and racial inclusiveness can create new constructs for male aging, conceptions that are engaging, uplifting and liberating.


I agree with his assertion but I also suggest that this view should include the Boomer women; men accepted and embraced feminism, but the women were leaders because they lead the way for us men to follow. In these times of uncertainty that the writer above discuss, women as well as men feel powerless and women will live longer than us males, so they will need to construct new conceptions of aging, which we men will adapt to and embrace.

Brent Green, the author of the blog, goes on to say:  "Author Cogswell identifies Friedrich Nietzsche (1844 – 1900) as the “soul of existentialism,” a thinker who has influenced contemporary psychology, literature, spirituality, art and music. Nietzsche wrote that “society everywhere is a conspiracy against the manhood of every one of its members.” And it seems true today that millions of Boomer men, vital and engaged as many now are, must nevertheless consider how traditional habits in western society could conspire to strip them of their opportunities to thrive beyond 60 and into bonus years promised so many....As the great writers about existentialism would urge, Boomer men must not become standardized old men.

Society has advanced and women are engaged in every aspect of society, so the ideas that Nietzsche and others argued, need to be expanded to include women. Nietzsche is right, society forces are conspiring against the boomers, and I agree, but would argue that it will be both men and women boomers, that will not allow society to strip us of the opportunity to thrive beyond 60. (I suspect it will be the women who will lead this battle, not the men). We will find a way not be become seniors and to remain boomers!