Friday, July 27, 2018

Rock and Roll Never Forgets

I was nominated to list my top ten albums that influenced me when I was growing up. When I was growing up I could not afford to buy music, and albums were not what we listened to, it was 45's in the 50's and in the 60's my friends would buy albums, I did not. The first album I bought was in about 1971(Bridge Over Troubled Water). It’s a sad thing when we, as baby boomers, begin to feel like “old fogies” when it comes to music and the “hip” things going on in popular culture. But when I read what the youngsters were listing I found it interesting.  It’s easy to forget that the rock music and many other genres of modern music got their launch way back during the days when baby boomers were the young people changing society and it was our music that changed the world.

So it’s good for us to remember such things about our heritage and what we passed on to the music and entertainment culture today.  In the song “Rock and Roll Never Forgets” by Bob Seger, the singer reviews the changes baby boomers have gone through as they go from youth to middle age and deal with pressures of work, family, child rearing and changes in health due to aging.  But the end result remains the same that at the heart of every baby boomer is a rock and roller who is just as capable as ever of enjoying the music that was the foundation of their culture.

One of the things that disheartened my generation growing up was seeing the rock and roll lifestyle take its toll on many of the icons of youth culture and music including Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, and Freddie Mercury.  But the unfortunate demise of these music heroes does not diminish the great contribution to music and to culture down through the years.  So as much as we grieve the loss of great talent, we can always celebrate what they gave to us and continue to give to us down to modern times as music continues to reference those great figures of 60s music as icons and inspirations.

But for every rock and roller who did not survive that turbulent time in our culture, we can look to great performers who did survive, overcame their addictions and went on to continue to give great music to the world decade after decade.  Aerosmith, The Rolling Stones, and David Bowie are examples of wonderful and talented music heroes that demonstrated that age and a few wrinkles don’t mean a thing.  They continue to rock and roll today as hard and with as much heart as they did when they were in their twenties.

In a way “to rock and roll” is a metaphor for living life to its fullest and for staying true to your values and living life in a genuine way that never gives up on what’s important in life.  That is why we have always had the greatest contempt for anyone who sells out or abandons their core principles that they espoused in youth.  To sell out is to say that none of the great histories of the youth revolution meant anything and we are willing to turn out backs on it.  But to “rock and roll” means always going back to your roots and never giving up, even when age and busy lives and poor health say that you should slow down and not try to live with as much earnestness as you did when you were young.

Even at this dignified and “mature” stage in life, we should feel liberated to be able to go ahead and “rock and roll” in a real sense of the word.  The Bob Seger song was a hit because it gives us permission to reconnect with our roots and express that youthful enthusiasm again.  You don’t have to go to a nostalgia show to do that either.  There are dozens of great rock and roll acts that are giving to the children of baby boomers (and their grandchildren) that same excitement we got from The Beatles and The Stones.  

“Discovering” rock and roll all over again can be great fun for a baby boomer especially when you find a new act that has that power and ability to perform that reminds us of the acts of our youth.  They are out there so just get out there and uncover this great natural resource of talent in the music and culture of today’s youth revolution. This is one of the reasons I took up the challenge so that I could remind my young friends about the power of music.

Thursday, July 26, 2018

Speak to the highest in them

Whenever conferring with another- either face to face or across the miles - whether a human being, departed spirit, or sentient tree, always speak to the highest within them. 

It makes such a difference.

Boomers, Defining Marriage All Over Again

Marriage is a funny thing.  How you view it is drastically different if you are a teenager or youth with stars in your eyes compared to your vision of marriage when you have been ensconced in the practice for 20-30 years and looking toward a life in retirement as a married couple.  Baby boomers have experienced every aspect of marriage from that early idealistic stage through divorces, various redefinitions of marriage and now taking their marriages into their retirement years.  It may be that this next transition of marriage will bring as many changes to that special relationship as any that have gone before.

How you view marriage as you move toward your retirement years without a doubt depends on how marriage has gone for you over the decades.  If marriages are rocked with difficulty, separations, and other woes, retirement can bring a new dimension to that tension.  On the other hand, part of the commission of retirement is to begin to seek resolution of life’s struggles so working together with each other in the context of marriage can bring tremendous healing in this phase of life.

Each era of life seems to bring a new opportunity to define marriage and how it will be an important part of life.  When the baby boomer generation became parents, the shift was notable as retailers responded to their emphasis on being good moms and dads and away from youthful issues to some extent.  Then as baby boomers moved through parenting and into the empty nest phase of life, that seemed to bring as many challenges as when that nest filled up with children decades before.

There is no question that real life in the context of a very real and functional marriage, even with the problems that it brings is also a huge resource for us throughout life’s journey.  While sometimes the romance can escape from the marriage relationship if life brings struggles and as our bodies go through changes, that partnership and intimacy of a relationship is an incredible resource for coping with the big changes all baby boomers have had to face over the years.

This is the good thing about hanging in there with that marriage until you get to the stage of life most baby boomers are moving toward in this decade.  The things that can rob a marriage of romance during the working part of your married years are the coming of children, the hard work of raising them, keeping a career moving forward in the tough business settings we have experienced in the last three decades and seeing your own relationship evolve under that kind of “pressure cooker” environment.  

But a significant amount of those pressures begin to lift when you are able to perhaps scale back the work life, enjoy the fruits of your labors and let the kids get out on their own.  So that side of the pre-retirement years can actually be a fertile setting for a new romantic life between husband and wife to spring up.  Many couples, as they leave the world of parenting behind, experience such late in life romantic rebirths.  And this kind of late springtime in your relationship with your long-time spouse can bring the birth of new creativity in many parts of your life making it one of the happiest phases of life for you and your husband or wife.

A marriage gets tested throughout youth and middle age and marriages that survive do so because of mutual support and the ability to accept the other member of the marriage and compromise.  Since these traits will be well established in your relationship as you move into your fifties and sixties together, they will be a continuous resource to you as you face retirement issues, dealing with being a grandparent and being wise counsel for children who are facing life’s struggles for the first time.

But baby boomers should not be surprised if they see their marriages continue to change, grow and mature in new directions as each partner explores this phase of life for the first time as well.  A marriage is a living thing so we can take joy from seeing it become something new each new decade as, as we have done often in the past, we start defining marriage all over again.


Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Are you cool?

What if the coolest person on the planet didn't know they were the coolest person on the planet, because of a few self-doubts, a few trace fears, or the occasional twang of inadequacy. Or because they somehow thought fame, or wealth, or popularity mattered. Or because they just didn't know the effect they had on others.

It would be a pity, huh? A real travesty. And, of course, telling them wouldn't achieve much because they'd never believe you. Never. They'd be too modest to accept it. Too naïve to see it. And, well, too cool to think it mattered.

So... well... ah... let's just leave it at that -