Being Human

On this Sunday afternoon, I am thinking about being human. So here are some interesting quotes about this topic from GoodReads

“Yes, I value emotions deeply.
Call me sensitive, call me weak, call me outdated, call me anything you may, but tell me the truth, can you deny emotions give life to life.
If Emotions are an integral part of Being Human,
Why do people suppress feeling them?
Does the bruising scare them? Then I wonder who is weak?”
― Wordions

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 “There is some kind of a sweet innocence in being human- in not having to be just happy or just sad- in the nature of being able to be both broken and whole, at the same time.”

― C. JoyBell C.

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“Be the reason someone smiles. Be the reason someone feels loved and believes in the goodness in people.”

― Roy T. Bennett, The Light in the Heart

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 “When someone you love dies, you are given the gift of "second chances". Their eulogy is a reminder that the living can turn their lives around at any point. You’re not bound by the past; that is who you used to be. You’re reminded that your feelings are not who you are, but how you felt at that moment. Your bad choices defined you yesterday, but they are not who you are today. Your future doesn’t have to travel the same path with the same people. You can start over. You don’t have to apologize to people that won’t listen. You don’t have to justify your feelings or actions, during a difficult time in your life. You don’t have to put up with people that are insecure and want you to fail. All you have to do is walk forward with a positive outlook, and trust that God has a plan that is greater than the sorrow you left behind. The people of quality that were meant to be in your life won’t need you to explain the beauty of your heart. They already understand what being human is----a roller coaster ride of emotions during rainstorms and sunshine, sprinkled with moments when you can almost reach the stars.” ― Shannon L. Alder

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 “Do you know what the definition of insane is? Yes. It’s the inability to relate to another human being. It’s the inability to love.” ― Richard Yates, Revolutionary Road

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“My first world is humanity. My second world is humanism. And, I live in the third world being merely a human.”  ― Santosh Kalwar

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“Do not let the roles you play in life make you forget that you are human.” ― Roy T. Bennett

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“In humans (and humans alone), sexuality is embodied in desire--in the primordial desire for life-as-relation. That the sex drive serves the vital desire for relation--that on the level of the primordial process, the desire for life-in-itself clothes itself in the sex drive--belongs to the particularity of being human.”  ― Christos Yannaras, Relational Ontology

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“Yes, I value emotions deeply.

Call me sensitive, call me weak, call me outdated, call me anything you may, but tell me the truth, can you deny emotions give life to life.

If Emotions are an integral part of Being Human,

Why do people suppress feeling them?

Does the bruising scare them? Than I wonder who is weak?”

― Wordions

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 “Life is a Long Journey between Human Being and Being Human. Let's take at least one step each day to cover the distance.” ― Wordions

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 “Awakening to the people's nature for a person brings sadness and not happiness, for it is very much like glowing of a bulb from outside for others but inside own feeling the burning sensation.” ― Anuj Somany

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“As it turned out, being human was every bit as much fun as she'd always thought it would be.” ― Marissa Meyer, Cress

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“We're nothing but human.

The way of life can be free and beautiful.

But we have lost the way.

Greed has poisoned men’s souls – has barricaded the world with hate; has goose-stepped us into misery and bloodshed.

We think too much and feel too little.

More than machinery we need humanity.

More than cleverness, we need kindness and gentleness.

Without these qualities, life will be violent and all will be lost.

Don’t fight for slavery, fight for liberty.

You are not machines.

You are not cattle.

You have the love of humanity in your hearts.

In this world, there is room for everyone and the earth is rich and can provide for everyone.

We all want to live by each other’s happiness, not by each other's misery.

We don’t want to hate and despise one another.

We all want to help one another human beings are like that.

You the people have the power... the power to create machines… the power to create happiness.

You the people have the power to make life free and beautiful…

To make this life a wonderful adventure.

We are all faced throughout our lives with agonizing decisions, moral choices.

Some are on a grand scale... Most of these choices are on lesser points.

But we define ourselves by the choices we have made.

We are, in fact, the sum total of our choices.

Events unfold so unpredictably, so unfairly.

Human happiness does not seem to have been included in the design of creation.

It is only we, with our capacity to love that give meaning to the indifferent universe.” ― Anonymous

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 “How shallow is the stage on which this vast drama of human hates and joys and friendships is played! Whence do men draw this passion for eternity, flung by chance as they are upon a scarcely cooled bed of lava, threatened by the beginning by the deserts that are to be, under the constant menace of the snows? Their civilizations are but fragile gildings: a volcano can blot them out, a new sea, a sand-storm.”  ― Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, Wind, Sand and Stars

Lighten Things Up With Retirement Jokes

Most people approach retirement in a gloomy countenance. They approach it as if it is a surrender to the hands fate and debilitation of the body. So it is important that one will help them realize that it is something to be accepted since it is an inevitable stage in one’s life. But how can one do that? It’s simple: poke fun at retirement. I have been retired for a while, and while one can approach retirement with dread, I can say it is much more fun than working.
   
Retirement jokes, like ones said on speeches are popular. Speeches tend to become emotional that it hinges every one in the room in a state of gloom and sympathy. But one can raise the bar in retirement jokes (without insulting the retiree, of course). 

Examples
   
In addition to talking about the wonderful moments the speaker has shared with the retiree, he/she can add something that will lighten up the atmosphere. One may give a stone slab, which has inscriptions on it, “in advance”. Friends may also joke and call the retiree “grandfather” whenever the latter tries to reprimand the former in a conversation can also help lighten the mood. But don’t overdo it, of course. 
  
Other gags that might be of interest is a wig with an unusual color like pink or purple, a follow up item to the joke that he may need a wig in the future. If he, in an inexplicable moment, declines it, say: “okay, then wear a paper bag instead if you get bald”. Always be ready whenever jokes don’t succeed; so keep those backup jokes ready!
   
Believe it or not, some service providers also write and sell personalized retirement speeches with witty jokes after understanding the personality and interests of the retiree. These companies usually add jokes about the retiree’s profession. 
   
If one cannot find enough retirement jokes, a little visit to the bookstore can help a great deal. There are joke books that cover a wide range of topics, one of which is retirement. A little scan here and there will help inspire the reader if he/she isn’t the natural comedian. These may also be good retirement gifts as well, helping the retiree have a good laugh in one of those boring Tuesday afternoons. 
   
There are also a lot of websites available on the net that provide a lot of jokes and free retirement e-books like retirement-quotes.com. The e-books that they have range from the “200 best things said about retirement” to “retirement wisdom you won’t get from your financial advisor”. 

Conclusion
  
There is a lot of leeway one has on inserting jokes in a retirement party. If you know someone who is coming near to retirement, you can send an email or two which has retirement quotes like “retirement is when everyday is Saturday” and “retirement: goodbye tension, hello pension!” It is a good gesture and gives off the sense that you know what the future retiree is going through. Again, keep the retiree (future or not) off tension as much as possible and make him/her anticipate retirement with smile and not with a sigh as much as possible.
  
And when the retirement party does come, keep the same lighthearted approach, inserting jokes here and there and probably some gags like the ones said above. Not only will the retiree will be less fussy about retirement, he/she will focus more about the people who kept him happy on that bittersweet day, especially the one who gave him that weird pink wig.

Dealing with stress as we age

My wife and I have been watching the events in the US as they unfold and we both feel for our American friends as they move along a path that is bringing change. Change is part of life, but when change happens too fast it can cause stress. We all know what excessive stress can do to your energy. 

Dr. Barnet Meltzer, who is perhaps the most renowned doctor of preventative medicine in the United States said, “Stress is the tax you pay for not taking 100% responsibility for your life.”

There are many schools of thought about what stress means, here are two ideas to think about.

The first idea is:

1.   Many of us consider stress to be something that happens to us, the event could be an injury or a promotion, falling in/out of love.

2.   Others think that stress is what happens to our bodies, minds and behaviours in response to an event (e.g. heart pounding, anxiety, or nail biting). 

Interesting ideas however, I believe that while stress does involve events and our response to them, the event is not the most important factor. The most important factor, in my mind, is our thoughts about the situations in which we find ourselves.

A threat is not just a physical threat, the threat could be to our ego, our self esteem, our health or our energy. Stressors that tend to affect seniors are the loss of a loved one; too much unstructured time on your hands; a change in relationships with children; or a loss of physical abilities, such as vision, hearing, balance, or mobility issues.

We all experience a little stress from time to time. It's not so hard to handle when we're young. But as we age, coping with stress isn't as easy anymore.

The classic stress response is fight, or flight.  The body reacts the same for every event we call stressful. The following is from Dr. Wilsons webpage on how the stress response works:

Every event you experience, whether it’s a sleepless night or an argument, may trigger a dual chain reaction that prepares you to physically respond to the stressor. An initial alarm reaction happens before you’re even aware of it in which your brain and sympathetic nervous system directly stimulate your adrenal glands to produce epinephrine (adrenaline) to prepare every part of your body for immediate “fight or flight”.

This is quickly followed by a stress response regulated through your hypothalamic-pituitary-adrenal (HPA) axis. It begins with a message from the hypothalamus in your brain and results in the secretion of adrenal stress hormones that prepare every part of your body to sustain “fight or flight” as long as necessary. In order to accomplish this, adrenal hormones are able to affect every cell and system in your body and brain.

When the brain senses danger or a need to fight, it sounds the alarm for action: it tells the muscles to tighten and signals the adrenal glands to release stress hormones—such as adrenaline and cortisol. Those hormones make you breathe faster, getting more oxygen to your muscles, and they trigger the release of sugar and fat into the blood, giving your cells more energy. To accommodate these needs, your heart beats faster and your blood pressure goes up. These physical changes are all part of the stress response, which is helpful if you need to jump out of the way of danger. Once the brain senses safety, body function returns to normal.

This routine isn't harmful if it occurs once in a while. But if you put your body through those paces frequently, or even constantly, you may suffer a cascade of dangerous and sometimes lasting effects such as high blood pressure, a weakened immune system, anxiety, depression, insomnia, heartburn, indigestion, and an increased risk for heart disease.

As we age, our body response differently to stress, and the symptoms may take longer to get over and may cause other problems for us. Symptoms of stress may include tension headaches, indigestion, heart palpitations, poor concentration, sleep difficulties, anxiety, irritability, crying, or overeating.

Stress may be having a physical impact on you that may include any underlying conditions you have, such as high blood pressure. Managing your stress is important at any age, but more important as we age.

A big part of stress management focuses on triggering the opposite of the stress response: the relaxation response, which helps lower blood pressure, heart rate, breathing rate, oxygen consumption, and stress hormones. Techniques to elicit the response include yoga, tai chi, meditation, guided imagery, and deep breathing exercises. Eating a healthy diet and getting plenty of exercise are also important, as is nurturing yourself by pursuing activities that bring you joy, and making time to socialize.

  

Additionally, not all situations that are labelled "stressful" are negative. The birth of a child, being promoted or moving to a new home may not be perceived as threatening. However, we may feel that situations are "stressful" because we don't feel fully prepared to deal with them.

All situations in life can be stress-provoking, but it is our thoughts about situations that determine whether they are a problem to us.  How we perceive a stress-provoking event and how we react to it determines its impact on our health.

We may be motivated and invigorated by the events in our lives, or we may see some as "stressful" and respond in a manner that may have a negative effect on our physical, mental and social well-being. If we always respond in a negative way our health and happiness may suffer. By understanding ourselves and our reactions to stress-provoking situations, we can learn to handle stress more effectively.

Facing your fear

This message is short and simple: Pick one thing that normally scares you... and focus on it.  Face it head-on.

Why? Because the secret weapon against fear is your focus. Specifically, focusing on the present moment.  The power question to ask is: "What can I do, in this exact moment, to combat this fear?" (The other reason you should focus on the present moment? Fear comes from focusing on the future - when you focus on the present, you're safe.)

Challenge yourself to face at least one fear this week.  You don't necessarily have to conquer it or completely overcome it - but you do need to face it with focus!