Part 2 Living paycheck to paycheck

Increase your income

Cut your cell phone plan

Have you looked at your cell phone history lately? If you’re using less than your allotted minutes, text, or data, switch to a lower plan. Comb through your history and bills, then ditch anything you’re not using.

Ditch the landline

It may be time to cut the landline. Cutting your landline service can save $25 to $30 a month – around $300 a year.

Take a staycation

Staycations are all the rage lately for one reason: They’re a lot cheaper than regular vacations. If you’re trying to stash away an extra grand this year, consider staying home and living like a tourist in your own city for a few days.

Raise your deductibles

Raising your insurance deductibles will lower your monthly payment. For example, raise your car and homeowners insurance deductibles from $200 to $1,000 and you could save hundreds in premiums. Just make sure you don’t raise the deductible higher than you can afford if you need to file a claim.

Drop your cable or at least turn off the premium channels 

Use NetFlix to to watch your favourite shows but If you want to keep your cable, at least ditch the premium channels. HBO, Cinemax, and Showtime each cost about $13 a month or $39 for all three. If you cut them off today, in just six months you’ll be $234 richer. 

Cut out ATM fees

My old bank didn’t have nearby ATMs, and they charged a convenience fee when I used one outside of their network – so I spent about $5 for every ATM withdrawal. Going to the ATM once a week was costing me $20 a month. So I switched to a bank with more free ATMs in my area, saving $240 a year. If you’re paying for access to your own money, you should do the same.

Buy out of season

Buying out of season (swimsuits in January or Halloween decorations in November) can save you a ton of money. 

Sell what you’re not using

Want a painless way to beef up your savings? Go through your house and toss everything into a box that you haven’t used or worn this year. Then sell that stuff and put the money you make into saving by  going the old-fashioned route with a yard sale or a visit to a consignment shop.

Buy generic

Many products are the same, no matter the brand name. Skip the name brands on pain relievers, water, milk, margarine, bleach, cleaning products, and spices. They all worked as well as their name brand counterparts, and you could save up to 60 percent.

Use coupons

Vow to always use coupons, and not just on your groceries. With sites like Groupon and LivingSocial, you can snag deep discounts at local retailers. 

Quit smoking

Smoke a pack a day and you’ll spend $144 a month. In a year, you’ll spend $1,733 on cigarettes. Quitting isn’t just good for your health, it’s good for your wallet. But if you’re not going to quit, at least save some money on the smokes you buy for example buying in cartons 

Reduce your energy use

According to The White Fence Index, U.S. consumers spend an average of $96.55 a month and $1,158.60 a year on electricity. If you reduced your bill by 30 percent, you’d save $28.96 in a month and $347.58 a year.

That isn’t hard to do – just install a few CFL light bulbs, turn up (or, when it’s cold, down) your thermostat, and flip the switch when you leave the room.

Zen and mindfulness

A friend of mine talked to me about the concept of mindfulness and I thought it was interesting so I thought I would explore the idea. Here is some of what I found out.

Life exists only in the present moment, to lose the presence is to lose life," says Vietnamese Zen master Thich Nhat Hanh.

One of his followers, Jerry Braza, the author of "The Seeds of Love",  explains that we are each a gardener in the garden of consciousness.

Braza believes that it is our duty to go back to our gardens and to choose, plant and tend the best seeds. Each of us should know exactly what's going on in our own gardens and try to put everything in order, restoring the beauty and harmony.

Then, we need to grow the seeds of compassion, love, joy and loving kindness.

Braza discusses two kinds of consciousness: store and consciousness (the soil and the seeds, or things below the soil) and mind consciousness (the visible garden, or things above the soil). Whether or not our meditation can develop fast depends on the quality of the seeds that lie deep in our consciousness. Too many weeds, or stress and it's difficult to get focused.

City dwellers would almost certainly see a distinction between the inner world and outer world. But the two worlds are one and the same and affect each other, according to the Zen master. You cannot understand the outer world without thoroughly discovering the inner.

That's when mindfulness comes in useful. And Braza simply makes it more practical for those of us stuck in the rat race. Mindfulness defined in Pscychology Today  is a state of active, open attention on the present. When you're mindful, you observe your thoughts and feelings from a distance, without judging them good or bad. Instead of letting your life pass you by, mindfulness means living in the moment and awakening to experience

Braza recommends a slow walk, a visit to a park, or sitting on the porch or balcony as a way to discover "noble silence", or a unifying of body, speech and mind. There are other tips on reaching mindfulness such as:

1. Use a reminder of the string-around-your-finger variety. Wear your watch upside-down, put a quarter in your shoe, or put a smudge on one of the lenses of your glasses. When you notice it, let that serve as a reminder for you to notice your surroundings, become aware of your senses and your bodily sensations, and bring your focus into the present.
2. Practice slowing down time by attending to the subtleties of experience in the here and now. Take a minute and go get a handful of grapes. Now eat one—but don't just pop it in your mouth.  Instead, imagine you've never seen a grape before. Look it over carefully. Consider its shape, weight, color, and texture. Rub the grape gently across your lips, noticing how it feels. Before you eat it, peel it, as you listen to this song by Nancy Wilson. Now put the grape in your mouth, and roll it around slowly with your tongue. Notice how it feels in your mouth. Take a small bite, noting the flavor. Next, chew the grape slowly, focusing on its taste and texture. Then swallow, and follow its path down your throat as far as you can. You can have a few more—but remember to focus on what each one looks, tastes, and feels like on your lips, in your mouth, and down your throat 
3. Focus on the soles of your feet. Here's a good trick to return to mindfulness if you feel angry or aggressive. Shift all your attention to the soles of your feet. Move your toes slowly, feel the weave of your socks and the curve of your arch. Breathe naturally and focus on the soles of your feet until you feel calm.

But whatever you do, be mindful every step of the way. That's the goal of mindfulness, or mindful awareness. "Mindfulness is bringing our whole being to everything we do," he explains. This means you don't need to be in a retreat at a Buddhist temple in order to practise or maintain mindful awareness of the reality. It's very important to stop, rest and renew in order to be in tune with the present moment.

But how does meditation practice benefit us?

In this slowing of the mind, thoughts are present, but his mind is not as "reactive" to them in solitude and the natural environment.

Buddhism holds, but to rigorously train oneself to relinquish bad mental habits. Rather than being an end in itself, meditation becomes a tool to investigate your mind and change your worldview. You're not tuning out so much as tuning up your brain, improving your self-monitoring skills.  "Whatsoever a man soweth, that he shall also reap." "Who harms not self, naught can harm," says The Bible.  Daily habits are an outgrowth of our beliefs. Educate yourself and revolutionize your thoughts to help you change your living habits. Enthusiasm is what generates change.

"You stop being always projected outside. You start looking in and seeing how your mind works, and you change your mind, thought by thought," explains Matthieu Ricard, a Buddhist monk, scientist and French interpreter for the Dalai Lama.

Then there's "interbeing", or oneness with all. You'd be successful once you see flowers blooming in your garden. In Buddhism, we believe mindfulness leads to concentration and concentration leads to insight.

Readers will find much to reflect on, especially on the subject of the inner garden. After all, this seems the only place to find understanding and compassion. While we'd all like to do a walking meditation in the woods, pick wildflowers along the way as well as bamboo branches for flower arrangements, the majority of us cannot afford the time to enjoy that environment.

So it is incumbent on each of us to find our own gardens, and appreciate the peace and miracle of where we are.

Friends just happen?

The following is from Patrick Mathieu who has a blog, choose the life you want, which makes some interesting reading from time to time.

For many people, friendships “just happen”. People come in and out of our lives all the time; and some of them stick around as friends. Jim Rohn once said “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.”

I want you to think about your friends and consider that quote. Next, I want you to think about the path you are on in your quest to Choose the Life You Want. Is there a fit?

Are your friends firmly in your corner, supporting you through your evolution? Or do you have the kind of friends who want you to stay the way you used to be in “the good ole days”? Do they look at you now and say: “Wow! You’ve really changed! I hardly recognize you anymore!” (said with enthusiasm)? Or do they look at you now and say “Wow… you’ve really changed! I hardly recognize you anymore!” (said with judgement, suspicion and disapproval)?

As adults, it can be very scary to think about facing the disapproval of old friends. But that fear serves no one. Keeping someone in your life just because they’ve been there for ages, doesn’t serve either of you if you are moving in different directions. People change, people grow and sometimes friends grow apart.

I want to leave you with a quote from Marianne Williamson.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness, that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small doesn’t serve the world. There’s nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won’t feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It’s not just in some of us, it’s in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

Every day is a blessing

One of the people I work with said to me this morning that everyday that she is breathing is a good day, and laughed. I have been very lucky in my life to have met and worked with some wonderful people who have had to overcome many illnesses. Many of these people believe that having a good attitude helped them survive and defeat the illness that they faced. I believe they are partially correct, attitude is an important part of how we deal with life.

I counsel that we cannot control how others behave, all we can do is control how we react to the behaviour. However, if one is sick, or tired, or depressed then our ability to control our own reactions are limited. I have a friend who believes that balance is one of the four (Spirituality, Health, Relationships and Work) important aspects of life. Easy to say, hard to do, I am not a spiritual person, so I find it hard to work that aspect into the balance that I seek. I strive to balance, relationships, health, and work so perhaps I am not a square, but a triangle. I think the ideal of spirituality residing outside of one's self is interesting but not relevant to many of my generation. I believe that if one should seek spirituality within, by the way we see ourselves and how we interact with others and our environment. Many of us are on the phenomenal plane and in the pursuit of pleasure, but the pursuit of pleasure sometimes brings pain. Maybe we should be searching for Bliss.

The Buddhist quote for the day: On the phenomenal plane we seek pleasure and the avoidance of pain. On the noumenal plane we know the absence of both - which is Bliss. - Why Lazurus Laughed by Wei Wu Wei...

Zen and Buddhist thought

Since I have started to realize that I will be a grandfather, I have started to pay more attention to the simple things in life and I have also started to take stock of what is important and what I hope to pass on, if given the opportunity. To help me I have, on my I google account, a section called Buddhist thought for the day and I find reading them helps be gain some focus on life. I liked this one as I think it allows one to think about relationships:

If only I could throw away the urge to trace my patterns in your heart, I could really see you. - David Brandon (Zen in the Art of Helping)...

Really seeing someone is the first step in establishing a strong connection and helps to build strong relationships. I think small children see a person without trying to trace patterns, so I hope to rekindle the joy of life that I was had as a small child and with that joy and the wisdom of life start to look for and find ways of passing on the understandings I have gained to my grandchild that I was not able to pass on to my children because I was too busy with my career and my own self centered views on life.

I wonder do we as boomers believe in the importance of relationships or do we believe in the idea of relationships. At one point in my life I probably believed in the idea of relationships not the value of the relationship so as I mature I hope to regain the wisdom of my childhood,