How do I pick through Fake News?

Back in March, Daniella Balarezo and Daryl Chen wrote an article for ideas at TED. The article was How to read the news like a scientist and I have highlighted parts of it below. I recommend you read the full article.

1. Cultivate your skepticism.

Science moves forward by challenging accepted wisdom. You can do the same. Healthy skepticism does not mean you’re dismissing everything as false — it simply means remembering the things you hear could be false, but they could also be true … or they could be something in between.”

2. Find out who is making the claim.

When you encounter a new claim, look for conflicts of interest. Ask: Do they stand to profit from what they say? Are they affiliated with an organization that could be swaying them?

3. Watch out for the halo effect.

The halo effect is a cognitive bias that makes our feeling towards someone affect how we judge their claims. If we dislike someone, we are a lot more likely to disagree with them; if we like them, we are biased to agree. Simply question how you would consider the claim if it came from someone else.”

4. Look at the evidence.

When evaluating a claim, Frans asks, “Can the sources be traced? Are they reliable? Is the conclusion based on a rational evaluation of the information?” And you should try to consider all of the research on a topic. Before you act on or share a particularly surprising or enraging story, do a quick Google search — you might learn something even more interesting.

5. Beware of the tendency to cherry-pick information.

Another human bias — confirmation bias — means we’re more likely to notice stories or facts that fit what we already believe (or want to believe). In your own life, look for friends and acquaintances on social media with alternative viewpoints. You don’t have to agree with them, or tolerate misinformation from them — but it’s healthy and balanced to have some variety in your information diet.

6. Recognize the difference between correlation and causation.

Correlation does not equal causality. Keep this in mind when thinking about our world. For example, if there is a rise in violent crime in your area and it’s being blamed on gang activity, or if a politician is credited with creating a low unemployment rate, take a wider view and look into the other contributing factors. It’s important to remember that there might be alternative explanations for a phenomenon.

Stay connected to your children

After 40 years of teaching, I sometimes get thinking about young teachers and young parents, and feel a need to pass on some words of advice. So the following is just that, advice from someone who has a bit of experience and cares about learning and people.

We are all trying to be accepted by others, but young people may be more susceptible to the wrong signals.  When dealing with young people remember they are trying to please you, especially if you are in a position of power over them. I worked in education for over 40 years and raised two children so the insights below, while not all mine are important to helping others to maximize their potential.

Children's self-concept is being formed right this minute, and right now, they see themselves, the way you see them. So, if you see them as naughty or bad, that's how they will see themselves. If you see them as kind and wonderful, that's what they will think about themselves, too. Oh, and just so you are aware, they will always strive to live up (or down) to their self-concept; because that's what we humans do. 

If you want a person to be good and kind and caring, catch them being those things and tell them! Believe it or not people like hearing you say nice things about them, and when you see them as a good person, they will want to behave like one.  So, in summary a person will be (or try to be) whatever You Say they are!

People and young people can send mixed messages. One minute they want to be independent, the next they  want you to stay with them forever. Be connected is one of the most important thing in their life. So, while they need their freedom to safely explore, they also need you to be a safe harbor.

Our attitude affects not just their behavior, but to quote some really smart people, “Researchers have found that attachment patterns established early in life can lead to a number of outcomes. For example, children who are believe that they are securely attached at a young age, tend to develop stronger self-esteem and better self-reliance as they grow older. These children also tend to be more independent, perform better in school, have successful social relationships, and experience less depression and anxiety.”

Basically, your relationship and connectedness is setting the standard for how they will build relationships and connect with others through their whole life! Stay connected with your children!

You don't need you to be perfect. You just need you to be loving and connected. You will get through this together. Just see them as a person whose needs matter to you. 

Nurture, guide,  and love them unconditionally, because they will not be perfect either, and they will really need to know that you're the one person who sees  the good in them even when they mess up. We can learn from children, they  have a lot of things to teach us as while. Let's enjoy our ordinary and extraordinary days together, because our children and we won't be young for very long.

Biofeedback in Healthy Relationship and Self

Having constructive feedback from others can help you improve your life by discovering self and enhancing your relationships. We often teach from healthy feedback, which today’s latest solution such as biofeedback offer us ways to regulate the bodily functions through sound and light. The elements of this form of feedback focuses on the brain and body responses, such as the muscles, heart, temperature of the body and so on. The machines signal the participants by allowing them to read out prints on a monitor. The participants are able to monitor their reactions from physical responses. 

The natural remedies are something we already use throughout our life, since our body and mind tells us when to stop or take action. When your head begins to hurt for example, you might cease reading or watching television and close your eyes to relax the brain. Biofeedback provides you with ways to take control over your mind and body reactions. One can learn ways to take control of the central nervous system by controlling the heart activities, sweat, tension in the muscles, and even self-consciousness. 

When one learns to balance the mind and body it makes it easier for that one to discover the self, while working toward healthier ways of living that promote healthier relationships. By regulating and controlling your blood pressure through biofeedback, one can focus on what he or she must do to make the self healthier. If you find it difficult to relax, you can practice biofeedback through meditation. The practice will help you to focus on the physical and mental responses. 

How to practice biofeedback through meditation to promote the healthy self and relationships- 
You will need to find a relaxing, quiet area in which you can concentrate without interruptions. Once you find the correct place to practice meditation, relax the body in a comfortable area of your environment. Once you are relaxed, close your eyes. Center in on your brain’s activity while working to encourage relaxation. Next, focus on your toes. Visualize your toes and allow yourself to feel the sensations coming from this area of the body. Continue to move up your body until you allow the responses to express its feelings and sensations. Once you reach the chest area, start to acknowledge your heart’s activities. Notice how the heart is reacting. 

After you finish connecting with all parts of your body, start to become aware of your brain’s activities. Allow your thoughts and feelings to express it freely. Do not interrupt your thoughts; rather allot them room to express what it is feeling. 

You can go into subliminal learning to discover the self, but for now, you want to become aware of your body and mind’s responses in order to take control of your actions. This will move you to a healthier way of living, since you control your body. You can build better relationships once you work to improve the self. 

You can build a stronger relationship with the self by learning ways to manage stress through meditation and biofeedback. If you believe, you have other problems that are slowing your progress from building your strength you may need to seek professional advice from a qualified mental health expert or physician. 

In the meant time try biofeedback, since biofeedback can offer you many solutions for creating a healthy self and a healthy relationship with others. Various machines, devices and other biofeedback solutions are available online. Take some time to explore the latest new age solutions. You will find it easier to relax by using the devices, which will encourage you to build a healthy self and relationship. 

Top 20 Self Help Books of All Time

The following looks at one persons view of the top twenty self help books that they have read, I have read most of the books and found them to be interesting and informative. If you are on a journey of self discovery then take the authors advice and find these books or the books I mentioned a few days ago and read them, internalize their message and then act on the advice as you interpret the author. The author of this article is Matt Morris / The Unemployed Millionaire

After more than a decade as a public speaker, I've been asked hundreds of times for the best self help books that have made the biggest impact in my life.

After having read hundreds of books in my 18 years as an entrepreneur, I have to admit, it was tough narrowing the list of the best self help books of all time down to only 20. I feel self help encompasses spirituality, financial, physical, relationships and many, many more areas of our lives. Needless to say, this best self help books list is by no means the end all, be all. There are no-doubt many others that will add tremendous value to your life.

For each of the best self help books on this list, I give my highest recommendation. With the new year upon us, I encourage you to jump out of your comfort zone and pick several of these to add to your library and read this year.

So here goes…. (drum roll, please)

Top 20 Best Self Help Books of All Time

1. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho

The Alchemist is the magical story of Santiago, an Andalusian shepherd boy who wants to travel in search of an extravagant treasure. From his home in Spain he journeys to the markets of Tangiers and across the Egyptian desert to a fateful encounter with the alchemist. The story of the treasures he finds on his journey teaches us about the essential wisdom of listening to our hearts, learning to read the signs along life's path, and, above all, following our dreams.

2. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey

Covey presents a holistic, integrated, principle-centered approach for solving personal and professional problems. With powerful insights and spot on anecdotes, Covey reveals a pathway for living with fairness, integrity, service, and human dignity–principles that give us the security to adapt to change and the wisdom and power to take advantage of the opportunities that change creates.

3. The Power of Now by Eckhart Tolle

Tolle takes readers on an inspiring spiritual journey to find their true and deepest self and reach the ultimate in personal growth and spirituality: the discovery of truth and light. In writing about enlightenment, he introduces you to it's natural enemy, your mind. He goes further by showing readers how to live in the present moment.

4. Rich Dad, Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki

Kiyosaki tackles the "financial literacy" that's never addressed in schools. He had two father figures growing up. One who struggled paycheck to paycheck for a lifetime whom he called "poor dad" and the other who was a multimillionaire eighth grade dropout he lovingly calls "rich dad". The concept behind the book is that rich people have money work for them while the poor work for money. This is a must read to change anyone's negative belief system on money or to further your understanding on how money can work for you.

5. How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

This is one of the most timeless self help books ever written. Carnegie believed that most successes come from an ability to communicate effectively versus brilliant insights. This book teaches these skills by showing you how to value people and help them feel appreciated rather than manipulated.

6. The Road Less Traveled by M Scott Peck

When a book opens with "Life is difficult", you know it's going to wake you up and provide you with some candid lessons. His timeless voice in The Road Less Traveled continues to help us explore the nature of loving relationships and leads us toward a new peace and fulfillment. You will learn how to distinguish dependency from love; how to become a more sensitive parent; and ultimately how to become one's own true self.

7. Think and Grow Rich by Napoleon Hill

Hill was one of the first ever self help authors, and his books are incredibly relevant today. Think and Grow Rich condenses his laws of success and provides you with 13 principles of personal achievement. It is noted that an individual with desire, faith, and persistence can reach great success by eliminating all negative energy and thoughts and focusing at the greater goals in hand.

8. The Four Agreements by don Miguel Ruiz

This self help book is rooted in traditional Toltec wisdom, four agreements in life are essential steps on the path to personal freedom. As beliefs are transformed through keeping these agreements, shamanic teacher don Miguel Ruiz asserts lives will "become filled with grace, peace, and unconditional love."

9. As a Man Thinketh by James Allen

This is considered a classic self-help book that inspired future books on the law of attraction. Its underlying premise is that noble thoughts make a noble person, while lowly thoughts make a miserable person. James Allen reveals how our thoughts determine reality. He shows you how you can master your thoughts to create the life you want instead of simply drifting through life unaware of the inner forces that keep us held in failure and frustration.

10. Man's Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl

This self help book has riveted generations of readers with its descriptions of life in Nazi death camps and its lessons for spiritual survival. Frankl argues that we cannot avoid suffering but we can choose how to cope with it, find meaning in it, and move forward with renewed purpose. He holds that our primary drive in life is not pleasure but the discovery and pursuit of what we find meaningful.

11. See You at the Top by Zig Ziglar

As one of America's most gifted speakers/authors in motivation, the late Zig Ziglar shares the secrets of climbing the stairway to personal success. He presents a proven program of self-development based upon the foundation of a winning self-image.

12. The Celestine Prophecy by James Redfield

In the rain forests of Peru, an ancient manuscript was discovered. It includes 9 key insights on life. Drawing on ancient wisdom, it shows you how to make connections among the current events in your life and let's you see what is going to happen to you in the future. This book can help you understand why you are where you are in life and align you with a new optimism for your future.

13. The Power of Positive Thinking by Norman Vincent Peale

Dr. Peale shows you 10 simple rules to obtain confidence, 3 proven secrets for vigor, 5 techniques to overcome defeat and much, much more. This book proves that an attitude can change lives, win success in all things, and overcome obstacles.

14. The Science of Getting Rich by Wallace D. Wattles

Originally published in 1910, this book takes the mystery out of wealth accumulation and breaks it down into a scientific formula. The text is divided into 17 quick, no nonsense chapters that show you how to oconquer mental barriers, and how creation, not competition, is the true key to attracting wealth.

15. The Seven Spiritual Laws of Success by Deepak Chopra

Chopra's teachings are summed up in 7 simple principles which can be applied to all areas of your personal life to create success. Chopra's basic premise is that personal understanding and harmony promote fulfilling relationships and material abundance without extra effort. Each of the chapters provide specifics on how to achieve it.

16. The Magic of Thinking Big by David J. Schwartz

Millions of people all over the world have improved their lives using this book. Schwartz will help you sell better, lead more effectively, earn more money, and (this is a big one) find more happiness and peace of mind.He proves that you don't need innate talent to achieve massive success but you do need to understand the habit of thinking and behaving in ways that get you there.

17. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers

We've all got fears which is why I love this book! Whatever your fear, here is your chance to push through it once and for all. You'll discover how to move from victim to creator, the 10-step process to turn off the negative talk in your head and how to create more meaning in your life by overcoming those fears.

18. Awaken the Giant Within by Anthony Robbins

Tony Robbins is famous for his motivational speaking but this is, by far, one of the best self help books of all time. Robbins shows you his most effective strategies and techniques for mastering your emotions, your body, your relationships, your finances, and your life through a step-by-step program teaching self-mastery that enables you to discover your true purpose, take control of your life and harness the forces that shape your destiny.

19. The Power of Intention by Wayne W. Dyer

This isn't your typical book on intention. Dyer has researched intention as a force in the universe that allows the act of creation to take place. This book explores intention—not as something you do—but as an energy you're a part of. We're all intended here through the invisible power of intention. He's the first in our industry to look at intention as a field of energy that you can access to begin co-creating your life with the power of intention.

20. What to Say When You Talk to Your Self by Dr. Shad Helmstetter

Don't overlook this book because it's #20 on my Top 20 Best Self Help Books of all time list. I've recommended this book to many friends and family members who's lives have been changed dramatically as a result of reading this book. Self doubt? Read this book. In secure about anything? Read this book. I'm sure you get the idea.

Matt Morris is an eight-time bestselling author, including his #1 bestseller, TheUnemployed Millionaire: Escape the Rat Race, Fire Your Boss and Live Life onYOUR Terms!

Can you say No with confidence?

You know those times when you feel pressured into doing something for a friend? Maybe it's to rearrange your schedule, or maybe it's giving up your weekend to help them 

The pressure from these kinds of situations can be pretty intense. You don't want to lose the friend, you believe that you don't want to piss them off. 

So you "cave" and put yourself out because of the fear. 

Some could call this extreme sacrifice right? That's just your willingness to go "above and beyond" and do what's best for others.  

I don't think serving someone is supposed to make you feel the way this does. This is a feeling of obligation fueled by the fear of a huge stick of losing your friend. You feel that you "have" to do it or... 

This is a fake choice. This is something setup by your mind and your programming. Those two things trick you into believing you're stuck in a no win situation where the only way out is to suffer and help your friend and not be true to what you want or need to do for yourself. 

Have you ever said "NO" to someone with confidence? You know what happens when you deliver that word and it's clear that you mean it? 

What happens is that they accept it. 

What happens after that is that they often develop a greater level of respect for you than they have for all of the "Yes" men and women around them. But it really doesn't matter. Because if you're looking for respect from someone OTHER than yourself, then you've already lost. You don't need that. You can't need that.

If you do not need, then you cannot lose. And if you cannot lose, then you'll start to see some of the fake choices I mention above for what they really are... only a symptom of your fear. 

Do you really need that? Aren't you already carrying around enough crap? How about you drop this piece of baggage and move on to something that will actually help you have a better life? 

Today seems like a great day to start. 

What I believe I will achieve

We are limited in our success by our thoughts we can achieve exactly what we believe we're capable of achieving. Our beliefs can guide our destinies towards success or toward failure, for only we control our thoughts, However, we are also influenced by the thoughts and actions of others, without realizing we are.

Controlled experiments over many years have proved that children who are considered by their teachers, friends and families to be 'troublesome or terrors' actually end up getting into trouble with a high percentage becoming juvenile delinquents. However, the 'good' group of boys (in the same age group at the beginning of a study) believed by teachers, friends and families to stay out of trouble and succeed in school, go on to do so. Each group of children achieve in accordance with what people around them believe them capable of doing. These children and adults have lived up to the expectation of those around them. This is unfortunate because rather than having a belief in themselves, these people have given into the idea that others shape their destiny and do not take responsibility for their own thoughts and actions.

The conclusion of many similar studies is this: thinking does make it so when we allow ourselves to be influenced by the beliefs of others.  We know you can break the influence of others, but it requires hard work, a belief in your self. Here are some ideas on how to start to break the bonds of others.

1. Hold positive chats with yourself.
2. Surround yourself with positive people.
3. Think, 'I'm going to succeed'.
4. Think, 'I'm a winner'.

The only person you will have to convince is yourself. Other people are automatically convinced you're great and a success, after you have convinced yourself

One thought

Many of us feel overwhelmed by life and wonder what we can do, sometimes we have a tough time getting our act together, we cannot stay focused long enough to do. A thought for when you are in that state:

Make a choice and do something that you can do immediately and follow the Nike slogan, and just do it.

Don't worry if it is the right thing it probably isn't.

Don't worry about choosing the best thing there are probably better choices for you.

Don't even worry about what will come next we never know what that will be
Just do it and do it Now.

Enjoy the now of life, so you can enjoy the WOW of life