Thought to ponder

A great trick to getting what you want, fast, though one requiring a deep level of understanding, is "insistence." Not the kind, however, that expects "life" to behave a certain way, but the kind that expects you to behave a certain way.

Do you need/want more sleep?

How consistently are you sleeping 7-9 hours per night? Please remember the word here is “consistently.”  Begin a journal on how you could start to improve your sleep. A good nights sleep begins with having a healthy, active day.

Do you activate your physical body with stretching or a workout every morning? In addition, do you begin your day strategically planning or in reaction-mode responding to your emails, messages and demands of others? How much of your first 60-minutes is really spent thinking and finding your center and purpose? Write how you could improve.

“Block Time” is a focus-management approach that requires “blocking out” significant amounts of time to advance or complete a major project in your life. It requires you to get clear on a major dream and schedule real time to leap towards it. Do you tend to schedule uninterrupted blocks of time to work each day, or are you in reaction mode all day? Journal here on how you could improve:

Do you take at least one standing break per hour when working or during times, you are sitting? Do you move and stretch during that time? How could you take more breaks during each hour and what will you do to remind yourself to do it?

Do you meditate or take a walk each single day on a consistent basis? What practice could you begin to reset your mind toward peace and freedom each day and how will you remind yourself to practice every day?

Increasing our focus, energy, and effectiveness by 30% every single week is easy, make a plan, and follow it by improving your answers to the above. Start by listing your priorities ever day

PRIORITIES

The main things I must complete today, no matter what.

List the priorities and to-dos that must be accomplished today and DO these before getting trapped in your inbox and other people’s agendas. 

Ever had one of those days?

Ever have a day when you feel like staying in bed, covers over the head. Let's face it, there are just some days where taking action seems impossible. 

Maybe something has happened and you feel completely discouraged.  

Maybe you've been taking action yet the results just aren't showing up so you feel dejected. 

Maybe you simply just can't get yourself into the right frame of mind to take action.  We've all been there.

How do you get out of this mindset? One way is to think about this question:

What inspires you?

What gets you off your duff? What inspires you? Brings a smile to your face?

For me it's music. I simply can't sit still when I hear Credence Clearwater

For one of my close friends it is reading historical novels, for another it is painting, another friend takes inspiring photography.  For some it may be having Gourmet coffee and cake.

Think for a moment about what gets you moving. Got it? Visualize yourself doing it. Good!

Now the next time you're lacking the drive to get into action, try using that to kickstart yourself.

Do you know what's better?

Do you know what's better than waking up to a 6 AM alarm clock, dashing through the house for work, and then suddenly realizing it's the weekend and you can go back to bed? 

Having so much fun, with so many friends, laughing so hard, spending, dining, being merry, and suddenly realizing that this time, you're not just visualizing. 

Happens every day, when you are retired. 

Don't be afraid to start the retirement journey, it is fun and a great adventure. 

What qualities of success do you have?

Six essential qualities that are the key to success: Sincerity, personal integrity, humility, courtesy, wisdom, charity.  William Menninger

How does this quote shift the way you perceive your world? 

How does this inspire you?  

Generation Gap

"I thought I would be in a different position at my age," she said as tears racked her body. I held her and let the tears finish. We had been talking about life, love, expectations. What brought on the sudden onset of tears was a discussion about wedding anniversaries. 

She had been talking about her parents 50th wedding anniversary and how they wanted to go back home to Scotland for this celebration. As part of that conversation, she mentioned that her mother told her that she and her father could not afford the trip. She wanted to be in the position to be able to pay for her parents trip. She was 36, in a seemly successful career, as she was working as a new Manager in a home care facility. However, I did not know that as a senior manager in a care facility in Canada she made less than my other daughter did working on the ski-slopes in Australia.

More came out of the conversation as she talked about how she had done everything she was expected to do to advance in her career and then some, but that she was still frustrated financially. She also talked about her new  job and how she was trying to bring about change in an organization where the people had been doing the same thing for the last ten years. She had been hired to bring in change, but she had not been given the tools or the support of her senior mangers, so she was frustrated.

She was also frustrated because with all of her hard work, she was still just getting by and I think she felt trapped and frustrated. She and my daughter had been talking and my daughter volunteered me to give advice. I don't like giving advice so rather than give advice I listened and asked questions. The questions led to the tears and through the pain to some realizations about paths forward that she could take. The young lady was like a daughter to me, and I hope that she will find peace. 

For her parents 50th she decided that she would contact her brother and sister and that the three of them would cover the cost of the flight for her parents. For her work she was going to talk to her senior manager and try to get some better tools to bring about the change the home needed. For herself, she was going to work hard at resting and taking steps to de stressing her life. I know that she is working hard at getting pregnant and my hope is that she is able to get this wish.  Her situation is not unlike many in the children of the boomers, they are not where they want to be and they are feeling trapped, but by the end of the evening I was confident that she was feeling a modicum of hope.

Fear (Thought for the day)

Fear just means you've forgotten how deeply you're loved, how safe you are, and that happiness will return, like you've never known it before.

Congratulations to all born in the: 1930's, 1940's, 50's, 60's, 70's and Early 80's

 !!! First, you survived being born to mothers who smoked and/or drank while they carried us. They took aspirin, ate blue cheese dressing, tuna from a tin, and didn't get tested for diabetes. 

Then after that trauma, your baby cots were covered with bright colored lead-based paints. You had no childproof lids on medicine bottles, doors or cabinets and when you rode your bikes, you had no helmets, not to mention, the risks you took hitchhiking .. 

As children, you would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags. Riding in the back of a van - loose - was always great fun. You drank water from the garden hosepipe and NOT from a bottle. You shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle and NO ONE actually died from this. 

You ate cakes, white bread and real butter and drank pop with sugar in it, but you weren't overweight because...... YOU WERE ALWAYS OUTSIDE PLAYING!! You would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the streetlights came on. No one was able to reach you all day. And you were OK. 

You would spend hours building your go-carts out of scraps and then ride down the hill, only to find out you forgot the brakes. After running into the bushes a few times, you learned to solve the problem . 

You did not have Playstations, Nintendo's, X-boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, no video tape movies, no surround sound, no mobile phones, no text messaging, no personal computers, no Internet or Internet chat rooms..........YOU HAD FRIENDS and you went outside and found them! 

You fell out of trees, got cut, broke bones and teeth and there were no lawsuits from these accidents you played with worms(well most boys did) and mud pies made from dirt, and the worms did not live in us forever. 

You made up games with sticks and tennis balls and although you were told it would happen, you did not poke out any eyes. You rode bikes or walked to a friend's house and knocked on the door or rang the bell, or just yelled for them! 

Local teams had tryouts and not everyone made the team. Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment. Imagine that!! 

The idea of a parent bailing you out if you broke the law was unheard of. They actually sided with the law! This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers and inventors ever! 

The past 50 years have been an explosion of innovation and new ideas. You had freedom, failure, success and responsibility, and you learned HOW TO DEAL WITH IT ALL! And YOU are one of them! 

CONGRATULATIONS! 

You might want to share this with others who have had the luck to grow up as kids, before the lawyers and the government regulated our lives for our own good. And while you are at it, forward it to your kids so they will know how brave their parents were.

Define Your Own Success

"Among the things you can give and still keep are your word, a smile, and a grateful heart." -Zig Ziglar

Is success having a lot of money, or is it others being loved by many, being healthy or giving back to the community, or having plenty of material things.

Everyone defines success in different ways. The stay-at-home-mom may define success as being able to get up in the morning and meet her family’s needs throughout the entire day until everyone goes to sleep. The career woman may define success as being promoted within her company or even starting her own. The athlete may define success as climbing the ladder within the NFL or NBA. Then again, there are some who define success in simply living and enjoying each day.

What you need to do is evaluate how you view success. What does success mean to you? What do you want to get out of your life? These are questions that you must ask yourself when deciding what drives you.

In order to discover what you want in life you may want to ask yourself a few questions such as:

“Where do I want to be in 5 years?” This is not the question “Where do I see myself in 5 years?” Think about what you want in five years.

“How do I define happiness in my career?” It is important to assess whether or not you’re feeling fulfilled in your work.

“How do I get to the places I want to be?” You need to know how to get to where it is you want to be. You can’t go there blind or expect it to fall into place all on its own. You have to be proactive to make things happen.

“What areas in my life do I want to succeed?” We all want to succeed in more than just one area in our lives, so set multiple goals. For example, one goal may relate to your career while other goals may relate to your relationship, children, or hobbies.

“What are my goals in life?” This coincides with what areas you want to succeed, but you must actually write down your goals and set real milestones that you can accomplish.

“What kind of balance do I need in my life?” You must find a balance between work, family, and personal time for you to feel fulfilled. If you have a tendency to over-extend yourself, it’s important to find an equal balance so no area of your life goes unnoticed.

Evaluate Yourself and Your Needs


Those self-reflection questions open the door for you to discover and define what success means to you. Others cannot decide your success. If you follow someone else’s blueprints to success and it doesn’t fit with your personality, then you’re going to be miserable. You just have to evaluate yourself and put your dreams, wants, and needs into perspective. After all, your success is yours. No one can make the decisions for you

Leverage the magic of belief

Those folks, who meet with life success and then tell the world it was due to their hard work, really make me mad. The reason is they delude themselves and others because they tell everyone that their success is due to their hard work. The reality is that they almost NEVER work harder than others. They don't even work smarter than others.

They simply leveraged the magic of belief, by thinking, speaking, and acting in line with what they wanted.

But, oh, no, they have to go out and tell impressionable minds that it was their hard work, and so, for all who listen and nod, it becomes hard work.

Leverage the magic of belief but when it works, do not tell people that your success was due solely to your hard work. That is part of what success is about, but the main ingredient for success is believing in yourself.

Another way of looking at life

The following is interesting and comes from a book called Oil for your Lamp, which I recommend to you. The women I know are great people, but they have an approach to life that I sometimes find puzzling and so when I read this, I realized that the approach they take is one that I should consider as a man who is very much inner directed.

We don't do the things we know are good for us because we are so busy taking care of others that we neglect ourselves. The problem isn't lack of information—we have plenty of information about the importance of sleep, healthy foods, and exercise. The problem is how we prioritize our lives.

Psychologists tell us that some people are inner-directed and some are other-directed. That is, some people focus on their own internal guidance system for making choices about how to spend their time and energy. Their own self-interest ranks very high on their list of priorities. "What's best for me?" is a key guiding principle in determining where they focus their attention and how they make day-to-day decisions.

And some people are other-directed, which means that their primary focus is external, not internal. They are primarily concerned with relationships, especially people they care about. "How can I help others?" is a key question in how they spend their time and energy. Building and nurturing relationships with loved ones, family, friends, neighbors, and coworkers is the guiding principle in their lives.

Research indicates that, in general, men tend to be more inner-directed, while women tend to be more other-directed. There are exceptions, of course, but as a group, men are focused on themselves while women are focused on other people. Men like to build things while women like to build relationships.

This difference in psychological orientation goes a long way toward helping us understand why women often do such a poor job of taking care of ourselves. Women run around filling others' lamps with oil, but forget to fill our own lamps first. Then women wonder why they are often exhausted, frazzled, stressed-out, anxious and/or depressed!

Awareness is the first step toward solving a problem. For more information check out the book

Keep the dream alive part 2

Yesterday I suggested that your plan was working and that you should keep the dream alive, how you may ask?

Well be honest and think of all your dreams that have already come true.

A lot, right? Tons. Now, do you remember how before all the big ones came true, when you were pushing, reaching, and striving; hoping, wishing, and praying; you'd think to yourself, "then I'll be freer... then I'll rock... then I'll know all things are possible... how happy I will be!"?

Let's keep those promises to yourself you deserve them.

Love who you are.

Have you realized that your age, experience, skin color, personality, accent, style, saunter, weight, and height, today, are setting you up big-time for the best of your life, while adding considerably to your animal magnetism?

Wisdom comes from age

We have wisdom based on the age of the human race; some believe we're older than the sun, wiser than the moon, and deeper than the depths of space. 

As humankind we've always been together, we'll always be together, on this wonderful planet, and nothing will ever change this. 

Whatever you can imagine, you can make happen. Whatever you want, you already have (but are not aware of it yet). And for as long as you have thoughts to think, dreams to weave, and seeds to sow, NOTHING, for  you, will be impossible.

Thought for the day

Rarely  are the first steps in a journey anything like the final ones, either in direction, pace, or grace. So please believe me when I tell you that none of those things are even half as important as the fact that there are steps at all.  

Do why not start the journey?

Just Start

I thought this was an interesting thought, do you realize that for all the people in all the world who actually "get it," few actually give it to themselves 

Whatever it is you want, just start.

Give yourself compliments, praise, and presents.

Give yourself time, permission, and love. Hugs, kisses, and smiles. Winks, laughs, and applause.

And the world will give you even more.

Now, please - just start

Thoughts on weddings

We recently went to a two weddings one was for a couple that were older and one was for a younger couple. I was struck by differences in the two styles, which may be due more to the personalities of the couples rather than the ages of the couples. 

The first wedding was between a man in his 50's and a young lady in her 30's. At the wedding reception, the speeches and slideshows highlighted the different cultures of the two families, and the focus while on the wedding couple also highlighted the wedding party and the accomplishments of each member of the party. What also struck me as interesting was that there was a lack of single men at the reception while there was a lot of single young women in their 30's in attendance. Weddings are an important milestone in a relationship, the couple has chosen to formalize their relationship and while many do not see the value in the ceremony of marriage, many do.

The second couple were both in their twenties and the ceremony was held outdoors in a field, with close family and friends. The weather held and he setting was unique, and the focus of the wedding was on the wedding couple, the wedding party was not highlighted during the reception. The same situation with respect to the number of single women and single men in attendance applied. Very strange to me that there were not more single men at either event. Maybe women value the ceremony and the pageantry of a wedding more than men.

Lessons from the Luau

We sat across the table from an interesting couple from California.  As we talked about the Luau,  life, children and grandchildren the husband took out too small figurines positioned them on the table and took a few pictures. We must have looked surprised so they explained.  The couple travelled a lot and when their grandchildren were about three and four the couple had found the figures at a flea market. They bought the two with the intention of giving one to each grandchild. Instead they took some pictures og the figures doing things with them on the trip.

Once back home they created a travel adventure book with pictures and gave the picture book and the figures to their grandchildren.  The next time they left to travel, the grandchildren asked them to take the figures and create another adventure book.

The couple explained the grandchildren who were now ten and eleven still loved receiving their adventure books about grannie and grandpas adventure's. I thought what a wonderful idea, and a few days later we found our own figure and we created our first of  many adventure books for our grandson.

Prank phone calls

Every country has a different view of practical jokes and pranks. This was made clear when we were in Australia. A couple of young radio personalities made in part of their show to make prank calls as practical jokes to celebrities, politicians, and regular folk. They had an early morning show and it was well loved in Sydney. When the Duchess of Cambridge was hospitalized for severe morning sickness, the presenters made a prank call to the Hospital. 

The radio prank, which was pre-recorded and vetted by lawyers from the radio station before it was broadcast, was picked up by media worldwide and was acutely embarrassing for the hospital. One of the results of the prank call was that the London nurse who answered the prank call was found dead after getting tricked in the prank call by the Australian deejays who successfully pried information about mom-to-be Kate Middleton's hospital stay. 

The British press went on the attack blaming the presenters for the suicide and wanted the presenters fired or put on trial, the Australian press and the public were more cautious and I would say supportive of the two presenters. 

The two hosts, made tearful public apologies on television, have been taken off air, and are receiving counselling. One of the presenters said: “There's not a minute that goes by where we don't think about her family and what they must be going through, and the thought we may have played a part in that is gut–wrenching.

The death was tragic for the family, and friends of the victim as well as for the presenters. The resulting press furore  showed the difference in attitude between the two countries about practical jokes and prank phone calls. Prank calls are or have been a staple of some radio stations in Australia for years and are well received by the public and people who get pranked after their initial embarrassment move on with their lives. In England, I suspect that prank calls are not part of the culture and the outcry supports that idea. In Canada, shows like This hour has 22 minutes provide an opportunity to poke fun at our politicians and others. I found the difference in culture interesting and enlightening.

Self-improvement & Success – Hand in Hand

Self-improvement & Success – Hand in Hand

Everything that happens to us happens in purpose. And sometimes, one thing leads to another. Instead of locking yourself up in your cage of fears and crying over past heartaches, embarrassment and failures, treat them as your teachers and they will become your tools in both self-improvement and success.

Remember watching Patch Adams? It’s one great film that will help you improve yourself. Hunter “patch” Adams is a medical student who failed to make it through the board exams. After months of suffering in melancholy, depression and suicidal attempts – he decided to seek for medical attention and voluntarily admitted himself in a psychiatric ward. His months of stay in the hospital led him to meeting different kinds of people.

Sick people in that matter. He met a catatonic, a mentally retarded, a schizophrenic and so on. Patch found ways of treating his own ailment and finally realized he has to get back on track. He woke up one morning realizing that after all the failure and pains he has gone through, he still want to become a doctor. He carries with himself a positive attitude that brought him self-improvement and success. He didn’t only improved himself, but also the life of the people around him and the quality of life. Did he succeed? Needless to say, he became the best damn doctor his country has ever known.

So, when does self-improvement become synonymous with success? Where do we start? Take these tips:

• Stop thinking and feeling as if you’re a failure, because you’re not. How can others accept you if YOU can’t accept YOU?
• When you see hunks and models on TV, think more on self-improvement, not self pitying. Self-acceptance is not just about having nice slender legs, or great abs. Concentrate on inner beauty.